#im sorry this is like the most cursed thing ive ever written

[raitonsfw]

Hello thank you so much you are the first person to answer my request and I just lovedddddd it .

Another request with gojo where they are married for like 2 months and things are kind of stiff cause it is arranged marriage but then one day he sees that a group are guys ate harassing his wife everyday as she takes the train . He asked her why she did not tell him about it and all and she says cause she thought he might even listen and stuff and things get spicy and it's his wife's first ever relationship.

I know this is big if you don't like it ignore it .

Thank you

𝚠𝚎 𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚊𝚐𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚏𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚟𝚘𝚒𝚍 | 𝚐𝚘𝚓𝚘 𝚜𝚊𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚞

synopsis: Gojo wasn’t the best husband and you weren’t the best wife, the discomfort of the arranged marriage taking a toll on the both of you. Two months in and he hasn’t even held your hand, let alone made a move on you– something you so desperately craved. It wasn’t until he saw two men shove you against the wall on the train that his natural husband instincts kicked in, the men dangling by their collars over the speeding blurry tracks. All he wanted to do now was protect you, shield you from the cruel world with a blindfold of your own, and maybe dry your tears with the comfort of his dick.

warnings: 18+ mdni, smut, fem!reader, virgin!reader, wife!reader, husband!gojo, arranged marriage, clan mentions, cursing (a lot of it oops), angst, yearning, emotions (a lot of emotions), crying, hurt/comfort, insecurity (marriage wise), gojo basically ignores reader for the first two months (not for reasons you think though), quiet arguments, first time, cunnilingus, blowjob, cum swallowing, fingering, p in v intercourse, dirty talk, he’s rough in the beginning cuz he’s selfish, creampie, aftercare, slight mention of future children (just a sentence or two), petnames (sweetheart, honey, baby).

trigger warnings: harassment; reader is cornered constantly by two men on a train. some instances of harassment include yanking the readers arm to get their attention, reader getting burned by a cigarette after trying to fight back, & reader being pushed up against the wall with ill intent.

a/n: imagine him in (this) cuz holy shit, i love this outfit on him. i got extremely carried away IM SO SORRY. haha also gojo says something incredibly corny during sexy time and i was going to change it but it made me laugh too hard just imagining him saying it so i kept it. i don’t think ive ever written this much in one sitting in my entire life. wc: 8k. m.list

divider credit: @benkeibear

Two months. 

Two months you’ve endured this situation, your body basically as stiff as a board as you shared a bed with one of the most respected clan members in Tokyo. Ever since you said yes to that question, that damned question you thought you never would’ve heard in this standing– ‘Do you take Gojo Satoru to be your lawfully wedded husband?’ Your whole world fell apart. After all, it was an arranged marriage and you did not know this man in the slightest. All you knew was his power, told to you by your clan specifically and what he had accomplished over the span of twenty-something years. 

It wasn’t meant to be like this, the distance that scraped the surface of your marriage. Gojo should’ve warmed up to you by now, as well as vice versa, but there was still a wall built between the two of you. 

You didn’t really know the aspects of a relationship either as you’ve never been allowed to date due to the conditions of your clan; that you were to marry someone from the Gojo clan when you turned twenty-one. Unfortunately, you didn’t have many options as Satoru had been the last one standing by the grace of his inherited traits. 

Because of your ignorance, you couldn’t quite gauge if this type of distance was a normality within marriage. Were you to just stick by him through thick and thin when he hasn’t even so much as kissed you since your last shared moment at the wedding venue?

Was this really marriage? Or were you just a placeholder for the potential of your clan, an offspring bearing Satoru’s inviolable power?

Sneaking out of the bed carefully, you tiptoed downstairs of the shared loft and sat against the sofa with your knees tucked into your chest. You contemplated turning on the television for some white noise but you didn’t want to wake Gojo up, in fear he might yell although he’s never done that. You deduced that he wasn’t a tyrant, the speculation blending in on days where he’d come home tired but he would still have a gentleness laced within his voice as he whispered a quiet ‘hello, how was your day?’ to you.

Gentle yet not an ounce of intimacy had ever shone through, his body nearly melting into a warm bath everytime he moved past you after formalities. He would barely speak to you for the rest of the evening as he went about his routine. You thought maybe his missions just took up his entire mind, it was his success story after all; his life had been blasted throughout Japan due to his aspects. But then you’d noticed his time away from home with his friends, karaoke bars dredging up on his bank statements. 

Which brought you to think maybe he was an alcoholic and he couldn’t you know… get it up. 

It was fairly common for alcoholics to become inept in sex, so you couldn’t quite put it past him if that were the case. But then again, you’ve never seen him drunk. It was entirely possible that he could’ve sobered up by the time he arrived home. He never smelled of alcohol though, normally it would seep out of someone’s pores whether or not they had showered the pungent smell down the drain. But as he slipped into bed with the covers huddled against him after a night out, he’d smell of the shampoo you two shared with a fragrance of lilac surrounding the bedsheets. 

Your phone slipped from your hand with a loud thud and you flinched, cursing at yourself inwardly as you swiped down to pick it up. You prayed you didn’t wake Gojo up, as he had a long mission in the morning. But it was too late as you heard him rustle his way out of the sheets, a disgruntled yawn escaping him as he put on his slippers. The bedroom was open space within the loft, separated by a thin glass railing that someone could easily lean over which is exactly what he did. 

Gojo peered down at you, his tired eyes still filled with sleep. You could still see the radiance of them even from below, the piercing brightness that you swear you’ll never get used to. “Y/N? You’re not in bed.”

“I’m sorry Gojo, I didn’t mean to be so lou-” You started clumsily, fiddling with the stupid phone in your hands but he interrupted you quietly. 

“Satoru. Call me Satoru.” He reminded you with that same tenderness from before, that gentleness you couldn’t quite get past and your cheeks flushed red. “It's cold down there, isn’t it? Must be freezing.” 

Gojo padded down the stairs and you stood up as he draped a thin blanket onto your shoulders, shielding your body from the icy air that the winter had brought into the house. He headed for the restroom, his slippers shuffling against the hardwood floor and you made a note to buy yourself a pair; the fuzzy socks on your feet didn’t do you justice for the wretchedness of the season. You stared at the caved in reflection of yourself from the windowed wall, the trees dancing in the wind with their roots tucked safely underground. 

There was a river on this side of the house as well, the water edging up against the stones that had been laid out carefully to create a small pond for koi fish. A bridge elapsed over it and sometimes you sat against it, your feet dangling as you fed the fish while waiting for Gojo to return home. It was a funny feeling to have so much of his wealth staring back at you all of a sudden. 

“You still up?” Gojo asked, a bit puzzled as he stood against the light from the restroom. It veiled out into the living room and you were met with his silhouette crowding the doorway. He had his arm up against the doorframe and his eyebrows raised slightly as he stared at you. His shirt was hanging loosely off his body and some of the light illuminated his waist, the curves that travel down to his– 

He shut the light off and you couldn’t see him anymore except for the tufts of white hair sticking out like a sore thumb in the darkness. Moving towards the stairs, you ascended them as he managed to catch up to you. You didn’t notice the way he held out his hand, hovering over the small of your back to ensure you didn't stumble back. And even if you did, he’d be sure to catch you without so much as a thought whether he’d fall down the stairs with you. And if you both did manage to fall, a laugh would probably erupt out of him as you both sat there in bewildered pain.

Crawling into your side of the bed, you felt the cold rush of the sheets lying amidst the tangle of your limbs. You laid down with a quiet sigh, the moon thick amongst the clouds and you stared at it for a while. The other side of the bed creaked underneath his weight and you felt his body brush up against yours as he pulled the shared blanket over himself. You wanted nothing more than his arm to wrap around your waist, to pull you close and flush against him and you pouted when he turned his back to you. 

Gojo had fallen asleep the second his head hit the pillow and that meant he wouldn’t bother you for the rest of the night. Though, you kinda wished he did want to bother you. 

The morning came with the sunrise shielding your eyes as you awoke, the man next to you long gone and off to work. The first thing on your mind was breakfast, a delightful hope that maybe something could be made in the kitchen. But as you headed downstairs, the cabinets looked bare as well as the fridge with no intentions on filling themselves. A shopping trip apparently was needed today and you sighed heavily as you got yourself ready for the day. 

The train wasn’t very full, the morning commute having passed a few hours prior but you still had to stand near the edge of the sliding doors. Everything went to your liking at the grocery store, you had picked out a bunch of fruits, vegetables, and of course a few sweets for Gojo because you noticed the macaroons he had brought home one day, half eaten on his kitchen counter. You had watched him from the comfort of the bed, munching on them while scrolling through his phone, single-handedly eating the rest of the box in one sitting with a happy hum. That’s when you realized his sweet tooth, the bulk of it surviving off of straight sugared pastries.

As you headed towards the station, you had a nagging feeling there were eyes on you. A familiar sense surrounded you and you wondered why it felt like that; you pushed it out of your mind though. It was most likely someone checking out your attire, the adorned outfit clinging to your skin. It had enough detail pointing towards your midriff and your thighs encased in thin stockings, maybe someone had just been attentive today and wanted to ogle at you. It wasn’t like you could stop them. 

The train back was much more packed at noon and you had been squeezed into a corner, next to two guys that looked to be middle aged with cigarettes between their fingertips. This was an issue in your eyes, as you realized they were the same guys that had been harassing you before whenever you took the train home. You had ignored it the first few times, the music you had blasting in your ears enough for them to turn their heel but the past few days as you stepped out of the house to do your errands, it became much more demeaning. 

The first time it was a subtle nudge with their foot against yours, kicking it lightly to get you to pay attention to them. The next time it an arm grab as you hopped off the train, your feet just barely grazing the ground as you hauled yourself out past the doors. And now, you didn’t know what they would try this time as you failed to bring earbuds with you. It seemed as if the world didn’t care what happened to you when you left Gojo’s hell of a palace, the bypasser’s backs turned against your favor. The skirt you wore came past your midthigh and you clenched your hold on the pole a little tighter, shuffling some of your bags against your forearms wearily.

“Heading to the same place, doll?” One of them piped up, a sleazy smile lazed on his lips. You tried to ignore him, but he certainly noticed your lack of music and he got up from his seat in front of you. You tried to move backwards a bit, but there really wasn’t any space to do so.

“Yeah, we can escort you there this time. Seems to me you got a lot of bags.” The other one said as he also stood in front of you and you looked around the train, factoring in the exits and the fastest way to push through people. You also noted that almost everyone else was minding their own business, fucking assholes with their headphones and haughty misplaced morals.

As you decided whether or not to stand your ground, you noticed a tall figure in the back of the train car making their way forward with unhurried ease. Maybe you could ask them for help, whoever they were. Or maybe they were in cahoots with these men who had been harassing you, readying their attack from afar.

“Can you please leave me alone?” You asked firmly, trying to move away again from where they towered above you. You really weren’t liking your odds this time and a wave of fear rushed over you as one of them yanked some of your bags away, discarding them on the seat behind them.

“C’mon, looks like you need help today–” The first guy started, grabbing the groceries from your other arm and you pulled them back toward you harshly. The second guy had sat back into his seat, aiming to finish his cigarette instead of bothering you. The first guy kept a steady hand on you though, a bruised grip on you and it started to hurt; a dull throb had begun to overtake your arm.

“Please stop.” You pleaded, swinging the bag into him hard as he tried to deliberately yank it away again. Some of the items fell out of the bag and another hand on your arm gripped you harshly, pulling you down towards the man sitting. 

“Quit being so stubborn. You’re boyfriend’s not here to help you, huh?” The second guy cooed, holding you in place as the first guy went through the groceries on the floor. He huddled some into his jacket, unaware of his surroundings for a second and you used that to your advantage. Hitching your leg up, you kicked him directly in the abdomen and he doubled over in pain, the groceries falling from his pockets.

“You little bitch–!” The second guy sneered at you as he dug his lit cigarette into your skin and you yelped in pain, dropping all of your bags now onto the floor. You tried to wrench your arm away from the searing burn, but you couldn’t. His grip was too strong on you and you vaguely felt your back slam into the wall behind you, pain filling every crevice of your body. It was such a quick interaction, your thighs trembled underneath you as the man pushed up against you to keep you in place. Pure dread raced through you as you squeezed your eyes shut with a scream readying in your throat until you felt the weight off your chest and loud yells were flooding through your ears, the cigarette falling onto the floor.

More like terrified screams, a rush of wind had opened up in the train and your eyes peeked open cautiously. They first fixed on the wide open doors of the moving train, the lights speeding through the instances of train signs and the accompanied men hanging over the edge by their shirt collars. Then you registered the white haired man who was dangling said men with two strong hands, threatening to throw them out onto the electrified tracks beneath them. Begs and pleads came whirling out of both of the men’s mouths and you were sure one of them had started crying, sobs frantically overtaking him like a pussy.

“Satoru!” You cried out and his head whipped towards you, worry flooding his face as he saw you collapse with shaky footing onto the seat. Reluctantly, he pulled the men back into the train and slammed them against the door as he shut it. 

“Don’t fucking touch her again.” Gojo threatened, the edge in his voice not faltering and both of the men nodded scarily quick. “In fact, you don’t need to take this train anymore. Looks like another route opened up on your commute, huh?”

Gojo put his hands in his pockets and gave the men a hard kick to the stomach before moving over towards you. One of the other things you noticed was that he wasn’t in his uniform, his figure filled in a solid black sleeved tee and khakis instead. He crouched in front of you and immediately took off his usual sunglasses, studying your face to make sure you were okay. The whirling blue stared at you with growing panic as you shied away from him, terrified that they were going to see through your every sense. “Let me see.” 

Gojo’s hands immediately cupped your face as you froze, checking for any abrasions and then moved downwards to your arms and he stroked over the cigarette mark gently with his fingers. You winced at the pain that blossomed at the peak of the burn and he instantly pulled his hand away, his mind running a million miles a minute as he frowned at the singed area. Suddenly Gojo pulled a smile, a toothy grin that made you utterly confused.

“I have a first aid kit stashed somewhere in our house, so you’ll be fine!” He said reassuringly, a lighthearted tone edging his demeanor. What was with him? Normally he was quiet around you and his bearings kept punctuation in calmness. You’ve never seen this side of him and you faintly wondered if this was how he acted in public. Maybe when he was home, it was a different atmosphere and he was allowed to let his guard down.

Home, our house? His words cut through you like a knife. While he tended to the groceries on the floor and placed them into the bags again, you couldn’t help but tense up even more. It didn’t feel like your home, your shared life– 

Gojo’s voice fell a few octaves, the cheery upkeep of his personality disappearing as he became serious. “Was this the first time they harassed you?” 

“N-No.” You managed to say, sitting up fully on the train. Your head pounded and you moved to pick up some of the groceries as they rattled against the train’s floor. The sweet you had bought for Gojo sat near his foot and you noticed some of the pastries had been swished as you picked up the package. You let out a quiet noise of discontent, his eyes shot up towards yours with uneasiness and he noticed the sweets in your hand. 

“Y/N, why didn’t you tell me they were bothering you?” He murmured, carefully taking the sweets from your hand and placing them in the bag as he glanced at the words on the package. Realizing they were for him as you don’t eat those types of pastries often, his heart warmed in his chest. Gojo tried his best to hide the smile that was trying to flourish on his face, it wasn’t the time to get sappy about sweets you bought him. “I could’ve skipped some of my missions, sweetheart.” 

Sweetheart. A pet name. You didn’t think it was possible for him to utter such fondness, the affection sounding like it danced on a pile of fluffy clouds above your head. It made you lightheaded, or at least you thought it did; certainly not from the hellish confrontation you just had. 

“I didn’t think you’d believe me.” 

“Why wouldn’t I? I would’ve gladly joined you on your escapades if you told me.” Gojo teased with a gentle tone and you frowned at him. He was still crouched in front of you, his black long sleeve nearly slipping off the sides of his shoulders as he leaned forward to accommodate some space on the train as more people filed in. The ends of his elbows rested on one of your thighs as you crossed your ankles together in between his feet, recollecting yourself fully.

“You barely pay attention to me now, why would you go out of your way to come with me during my errands?” You avoided his eyes this time, not wanting to feel fooled into explaining anything more than that. But when the silence grew heavy after a few seconds, you glanced over to find out why he hadn’t spoken. 

His face had fallen flat and his eyes weren’t shining anymore, much to your relief. But as much as it relieved you it also made you incredibly upset, a knot thickening in your throat as you watched the dulled turquoise glass over.

“That’s not…” 

“It’s true! You never pay attention to me. You’re either out with friends at a karaoke bar probably drinking away the day or you’re exorcising some curse late in the night. Gojo, I don’t think you–” 

“Satoru. I don’t drink by the way.” He corrected you, silent annoyance filling his voice but it fizzled out as he tried his best to remain calm. In truth, he was falling apart on the inside. He never knew, never realized that he had been so distant from you and that you were hurting because of it. He only wanted to give you space the first few months to let you get used to his routine and to help you find your own. As Gojo thought of that reason, it seemed incredibly selfish of him and his chest tightened up with regret.

Pushing the feeling down, he laughed mildly with a hint of sorrow. “My mission was called off. I was on my way home, no curses to exorcise today.”

“Satoru…” Repeating his name, you said it with so much sadness that his heart almost broke in two. “Even when you come home early, you spend the rest of the evening without me. And your bank statements–” 

“From me buying the rounds for everyone, that’s not the issue right now.” He confessed truthfully; he would buy the whole bar for his friends who have seen hell and back with him, but he didn’t dare to drink a drop as it disoriented him too much. “I don’t have anything to do this evening so we can spend it together, sweeth–”

The next words you spoke were barely above a whisper as you gritted your teeth to stop yourself from outright sobbing them. “You haven’t so much as kissed me since the wedding. Why would you want to spend time with me?” 

Tears welled up in your eyes and he quickly wiped them away with the tips of his thumbs, the long awaited gesture making sobs wrack your body; of course he was drying the tears that he made you cry. “I don’t think we should’ve gotten married.” 

The train had halted, a loud announcement blaring that it was the end of the line. It was your stop, the doors opening up with the wind blowing through the train again and you tried to stand before Gojo softly blocked your way. You couldn’t look at him. “Y/N, you don’t mean that–”

“I just want to go home. I’m miserable, -toru.” 

“Of course, let’s go.” Gojo stood up with his eyes hidden behind his sunglasses once more, hauling the grocery bags onto his forearms and offering a hand out to you. “I’ll make dinner tonight.”

That’s not what you meant.

When you got to the house, stagnant air filled the house with tension filling in the empty corners. Gojo had become near silent, putting away the groceries with his lips pressed in a thin line and you thought you made him mad. 

In reality, he was on the verge of tears because he didn’t know how to make anything up to you. It was entirely his fault, the distance that forced you two apart. He was too focused on his missions to give a damn about how you felt, your feelings were rendered useless in his eyes. He was so used to arranged marriages in his clan that he never expected you to be so fragile, the frailness of a new life seeming to shock you. 

And so he gave you space. He thought it was something you wanted– something you needed after being forced to live with a big shot jujutsu sorcerer from Tokyo. He knew his life was drastically different from yours, you had stability from living peacefully with your clan. You were promised fortune and happiness and future children you could call your own, something you must’ve dreamed of. Gojo had nothing, his missions keeping him afloat as he danced in the midst of the curses who tried to test him; not to mention the wickedness of other clans threatening to clash with him.

All he really wanted was someone close enough to him that he could let his guard down without a second thought; his technique fading away and being replaced by your hands on him, tearing away at the fabric that made him whole. He’s never felt like this before, the constant emotions flaring up his every sense and he nearly wiped out when he first saw you on the sidewalk, carrying the precious groceries to the train station. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of you, the readying sensation of wanting to be the one who carried your bags and alleviate your stress, he’d likely let you step all over him like a doormat if it meant he could get close to you.

But he just couldn’t.

“I’m going to see my clan leader tomorrow.” You expressed, seating yourself at the island in the kitchen. You had just showered, the muck of the men’s hand from earlier flooding down the drain and you sighed in relief as you felt more like yourself again. Gojo had swapped his sunglasses for his blindfold, his hair sticking straight up in light of the band wedging his bangs off of his forehead. He was still in the same attire though, the dusked sleeves rolled up messily against his arms as he meticulously cut vegetables for dinner. When he registered your words, the knife in his hand faltered.

“Would they even let you come back?” Gojo sulked, mixing the sliced veggies with the accompanying sauce that sat on the stove. “Clans are very unforgiving, you know. I don’t think you’d survive if you went home.”

“I don’t know.” You really didn’t, all they taught you was to be praising of the Gojo clan member you marry; your whole life had been to practically worship him on your hands and knees. Not that you’ve done that– the hands and knees part would’ve been nice though in practice.

“We don’t have to talk about this now.” Gojo turned towards you, leaning over the island with a spoon in his hand. “Here, taste this for me.”

A blend of spices hit your tongue as you savored the sauce from the dip of the spoon, looking up at him as you did so. You could feel the cursed energy flowing from him and it made you waver slightly as you made to say that he was a good cook. As he moved back into front of the stove, you swore you saw a small blush creep up his cheeks.

A bit of silence followed and you decided to help out with dinner, picking out some other ingredients for him to use. As you opened the refrigerator to scour the shelves, Gojo cleared his throat as he peeled the outside of an onion. “What do you expect from a husband?” 

Your head peeked over the fridge towards him in utter shock. You thought you weren’t going to talk about pointless intentions, your mind having been set on leaving. “What?”

“Huh, I gotta repeat myself?” 

“No, I heard you. Let me think for a second.” 

The first thing that popped into your mind was intimacy. A husband should provide a sense of intimacy that no one but him should give you; the very essence of a human relationship. This didn’t have to include sexual relations, but in your case you wanted it to. It would be nice if he held your hand during outings and offered sentimental gestures like flowers and a hushed compliment every now and then. But the feeling you really craved was his hands against your thighs, digging into your flesh as his mouth hovered over every place it could reach with a pointed tongue and his eyes boring up towards yours, a smirk prominent on his lips as you quivered under his touch.

Dejection sat heavy in your heart just then, reminding you that he hasn’t done any of those things.

The fridge wafted over you with a cold atmosphere and you pushed the thought out of your head, shutting the door mindlessly. You watched Gojo add the rest of the ingredients to the pan and he washed the cutting board he used with a hum, presumably giving you time to think over your answer.

But you lost your train of thought and after a minute of just standing there with a blank face, he spoke up in an amused tone. “You gonna answer me, sweetheart?”

“Do you not want to have sex with me?” 

“Where did that come from?” A quiet chuckle escaped him as he dried his hands of excess water, leaning against the island with his hip. He tossed the towel down on the counter, crossing his arms with a coy smile. “I should be asking you that question.” 

“I thought you didn’t care or something was wrong with me. That you didn’t want me, that I was just some offer that my clan made you-” You started, emotions flowing through your system as tears threatened to spill again. Your voice broke off in the midst of the sentence and you gasped for air as you tried not to cry. You didn’t realize how broken you felt until now as it trudged up towards the surface and you vaguely registered Gojo moving towards you, his smirk disappearing with a quiet coo. 

His arms instantly wrapped around you, pulling you into a tight hug and you froze when you heard his heartbeat against your ear. “Y/N, I wanted you from the moment I saw you walking down the aisle.”

“Satoru…” You whispered into his chest and he shushed you, his strong arms hauling you onto the island and you sat eye level with him and he bended slightly down in front of you. You had the genius idea to remove his blindfold with lithe fingers, hooking them and pulling upwards to reveal the vividness hiding underneath. His hair fell against his eyes and he smiled at you warmly as he blinked his eyes a bit, getting used to the extra exposure of light. 

Your head was swimming at his confession, the memory of walking down in your white dress crossing your mind fondly. And him in his pristine black suit with a pearly blue tie, sticking out like a sore thumb mind you, his eyes had draped against you as your clan leader gave you away. You never recognized his awe of you as you were shaking like a leaf when you first saw his demeanor; the intense refined energy whirling off of him nearly made you trip down the aisle. 

“Please, just let me make it up to you.” Gojo whispered as you folded his blindfold into his pocket, leaning into your space with his arms braced on either side of you on the counter. “Before you leave me, let me give you one good night. Though, that’s a severe understatement if you know what I mean.”

Before you could answer him, his lips had found yours with lenience hanging by a thread. Immediately resting your hands against the back of his neck, you enclosed them and pulled him closer to you with a feeling yearning so deeply inside you. It made your entire body shudder with want, his words running circles in your mind as you let his tongue slip in with growing fervor. Gojo’s hands found your waist, holding you steady as you edged yourself away from him. 

“-toru, -toru, wait.” You pulled back and he made a short noise of discontent, instead latching his lips against your neck. “D-Dinner?” 

“Oh, right.” He muttered into your skin with a displeased groan. In one fluid motion, he turned off the stove and carried you by the grace of one arm. “That’s not what I want right now.” 

As he walked the both of you up the stairs to the loft, you clung onto him like a lifeline and even as he laid you down against the bed, your hands never left a part of his body. You needed to be close to him, needed this one chance for him to change your mind; in truth you didn’t want to leave him. But it made him move like clockwork, huh?

Who knew all you had to do was cry? 

Gojo hovered above you and God, you didn’t realize how massive his frame was against yours until he was on top of you. His broad shoulders basically caged you in, keeping you safe underneath him as his tongue found your collarbone and lapped at it slowly. Your hands flew to his hair with a quiet moan, tangling in the fluffy snow of it and he hummed delightfully at your response. His hands played with the seams at the bottom of your shirt and his eyes darted to yours, asking for permission. 

Offering a quick ‘yes’, you felt your shirt lift up carefully and his hands instantly roamed underneath, focusing on the way you had no bra on. How wonderful it was that you were comfortable in that sense with him, his fingers tweaking your nipple lightly as he studied you for a reaction. A peaked whimper left your mouth and your eyes slipped shut, your back arching slightly into his touch. Gojo felt the heavy ache of his cock, pressing harshly against the front of his trousers and he honestly didn’t think he could get this hard. But you were just so pliant, every single touch enacts a spark from you and he wished he made his move sooner. 

He could’ve been buried in you every waking moment you were with him for the past two months and he wished he could go back in time and beat himself up for being such a fucking idiot. 

“-toru…” You moaned out as his mouth latched onto your nipple now after he fully pulled your shirt off, his teeth grazing the bud and he had to press his palm against his cock to calm down as you whimpered out little pleas. Pleas that were music to his ears, your hands pulling his down towards your precious cunt and all he wanted to do was sink in. 

But he had to stop himself from just going in blind with you; it was your first time after all. Gojo didn’t want to scare you away because of his sheer desperation, it was his own fault that he made you wait so long. It wasn’t about him, he needed to make sure you saw stars tonight. 

“Fuck, want to hear those pretty whimpers for the rest of my life.” He breathed out as his fingers traced your clothed cunt, teasing it with a hard stroke upwards towards your clit. Gojo hooked his fingers underneath the waistband of your shorts and again with a questioning look pleaded for an answer. You rewarded him with a quick nod and he pulled them out with ease, his jaw dropping a bit as he noticed how wet you were already. It practically seeped out of you and he held back a groan as he swiped a finger through it. 

“God, didn’t think a pussy could get this wet.” He uttered under his breath, sucking his finger into his mouth to clean it off. “And I’ve seen my fair share.” 

“Satoru.” You frowned at him, sitting up on your elbows. “Did you have to add that last part?” 

“Sorry, baby. Your pussy’s the prettiest, I promise.” He reassured with a smirk, bending down to face your cunt.

He teased his tongue against your clit experimentally and groaned into you as you reacted exactly how he expected you to, your hands clutching at his hair again. He ran his arms underneath your thighs, rubbing softly at your hips as he pulled you more onto him. Gojo licked a fat stripe up your entire cunt this time, lapping at the arousal that flooded out of you with satisfaction. You moaned out, your head tipping back and your hips rolled against his face subconsciously as he fucked his tongue into you feverishly. His nose pressed against your clit, rubbing it subtly as he pointed his tongue into you and you could already feel your orgasm rushing up your spine. 

“-toru, hold on…. Fuck, too fast, wait!” You whined out, trying to push him away so you didn’t cum all over his face but his grip on you became tight and his fingers dug into the tops of your thighs, his forearms cradling the backs of them. His eyes met yours as he noticed you quiver, the blinding blue heavy with lust and nothing could’ve stopped you then. You came all over his face with a tremble, the tightness in your tummy unraveling like a ribbon and Gojo moaned into your cunt as your thighs squeezed against him.

“Should’ve mentioned my tongue’s won an award.” He stupidly quipped afterwards and you burst out laughing once you caught your breath, the mood having lightened much more to your benefit. You could learn to love his idiot, if this is how everyday was supposed to be. You noticed the glisten that shielded his lower face and he grinned at you, his cheeks flushed hot.

“What, for talking shit?” You teased as he wiped his mouth with the inside of his shirt before pulling it off, his abs suddenly on display and you almost choked. 

“Hey now, I don’t talk shit. Unless it’s about Utahime.” Gojo retorted with a chuckle, moving to unzip his trousers. 

You stopped him and he looked at you confused but when your fingers ran against the outline of his cock, his eyes widened. He was fucking huge though you had nothing to compare it to and honestly  you didn’t need to to know that he was gonna stretch you open with one shallow thrust. You unzipped his trousers, his clothed cock much more prominent in front of you now and you palmed him lightly, silently gauging his reaction. A quiet groan escaped him and his eyes fluttered shut as you pulled him out of his boxers. And holy fuck, he’s supposed to fuck you with this? 

How was it going to fit? Gojo was so goddamn lengthy and wrapped your hand around him carefully, testing the waters as one of his hands rested against your shoulder. “Y-Y/N…”

“Yeah?” You breathed, running your hand up his shaft towards the tip, the crown of it and he shuddered– he fucking shuddered from your touch and he inhaled sharply, his mouth falling open.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to. Tonight’s supposed to be about you.” Gojo bit back a moan as you started to pump him through his words, tracing some of his veins with the extent of your eyes.

“I want to, trust me.” 

Before you really knew what you were doing, you took him into your mouth and Gojo’s hands flew to the top of your head quickly, a breathy moan emitting from him. “Holy shit, Y/N, holy fucking shit.”

You enveloped his cock in your warmth and he tangled his fingers into your hair shakily, the sensation sending warning signals flying to his brain as he tried his best not to just buck into your mouth. You sucked him down like a champ, and who the fuck taught you to do that, he thought vaguely with breathy moans falling from his mouth. He couldn’t help it, your mouth felt so good around him and it’s been forever since someone’s tended to him like this.

“Oh God, you have such a dirty mouth, huh baby? Who taught you how to– fuck, suck me off like that?” He moaned out, a smirk plastered on his face as he looked down at you and you scowled at him in return. You swallowed around him, listening to his whimpers and you noticed that his thighs had started to shake lightly. 

Fuck, you were going to make him come just from this. “Shit, keep going baby…please, sweetheart.”

You felt his cock twitch in your mouth, lying heavily against your tongue and you lapped at it with a hefty moan. You hollowed your cheeks and took him as deep as he could possibly go and you felt his hips start to move languidly, fucking himself deeper into your mouth. You gagged around him, feeling the wet slick of your saliva on his cock drag against your lips and his grip tightened in your hair. Gojo set a relentless pace for you, rutting in with vigor and you felt him tremble above you with a rushed groan following, his hips stilling. 

You did not expect such a bitter taste, his cum flooding into your mouth in viscous ropes and you pulled off of him with a gasp. Some of it splattered on your face and you swallowed the load in your mouth a bit shocked. Your cunt suddenly ached with want, his whimpers and how his face contorted in pleasure replaying over and over and- “-toru…”

“Mm, ‘M sorry honey.” Gojo breathed out, his chest rising and falling and he swiped his finger through the splatter of cum across your cheek, reveling at how tainted you looked. Thank God he was the one to corrupt you, if it was anyone else he wouldn’t have been able to handle it he thought. The way you looked below him, your tongue flush on his cock; he’d probably kill everyone if he couldn’t see that again. 

And that’s right, you were his wife. His precious wife that he took for granted.

“-toru, please. I need you, your fingers-” Your pleas brought him back to his senses, the numb feeling of the past two months falling away as he helped you lay back on the bed. You looked absolutely wrecked, your lips red and as you pleaded, it came out in rasps.

“Shh, it’s okay. Hold on, I got you.” Gojo had taken to your left side, making sure he had a good view of his fingers slipping inside you. As he pushed two inside, you keened at the feeling and your hips moved against them. He curled them upwards, grazing against your sweet spot lightly and you arched your back, your head falling against the feathery pillows with a wanton moan. 

“Want my cock instead? Much better than my fingers, baby.” He cooed, his other hand wrapped around his cock and pumping it to full length again. It wasn’t all that difficult to get hard again when you were splayed out in front of him like this, begging for him to do anything and everything. Before you even nodded, he was pulling off the rest of his clothing and hovering over you once more, pulling his fingers out of you with a dismissed moan coming from you.

As he positioned himself against your entrance, his eyes captured yours for the first time in a while and you felt your cheeks blush hot with embarrassment. You couldn’t believe you were begging for this man, but then again you couldn’t believe you weren’t begging for him before. 

“Might hurt a bit, but you’ll be fine.” He warned as he prodded his tip into you slightly and you shuddered, holding onto his shoulder blades for support. He sunk further into you and about halfway in, a dull pain started to ache within you as he stretched you. You whimpered out and Gojo immediately stopped moving, slight concern spreading over his face. “Are you okay?” 

“Shit, Satoru, you’re still not all the way in?” You whined and he merely chuckled, bottoming out with a shallow thrust that nearly brought you to tears. Gojo let out a breathy groan, his head lolling into the side of your neck and he kissed at your skin tenderly. 

“I am now.” He sucked a bruise into the crevice of your neck as he waited for you to adjust, his cock twitching impatiently inside you. He could feel you squeezing him, clenching around him to get used to the feeling and every single time you did, it sent straight pleasure coursing through his veins. “Fuck, tell me when I can move…”

“You can move…” You managed to get out, your fingers running up his back with a delicate scratch. 

“Thank fuck–” Gojo groaned out loudly, pulling all the way out of you and thrusting in with one fluid motion. You cried out at the sudden movement, you didn’t think he’d be so headstrong to fuck into you harshly without so much as a quick warning. “You were driving me insane…so fucking warm and tight for me.”

Gojo worked you open with his cock and you couldn’t help the sounds that came out of you, quiet whimpers and pleas of his name, ‘satoru, slow down a bit for me’, and he did reluctantly but not before giving a few harsh thrusts into your cunt. You wrapped your legs around him, taking him in deeper and he groaned in your ear with a shudder as he gripped onto your thighs.

“Stay just like that.” He whined in a merciful tone, his face now adjacent to yours and he gave you a spirited kiss, licking into your mouth with every damned thrust into your poor cunt. You both moaned into the kiss and he suddenly broke away to hoist your legs over his shoulders instead. “Actually… fuck, this so much better.”

Gojo was able to aim dead against your sweet spot that lingered in the corners of your nerves and you arched as he did so, each perfect thrust relentlessly hitting it and your vision clouded with unbridled pleasure. He looked so godlike above you, sweat glistening against his chest and his white hair had begun to look quite damp with the same moisture, falling beautifully over his eyes; those were on another level and you had to look away so you didn’t cum too quickly.

“All for me? Say it’s all for me.” He had started to beg, ecstasy coursing through both of you now and all you cared about was your releases, the euphoric pressure climbing up your spines with every strike of his hips against yours.

“All for you, -toru...” You babbled out as Gojo started rutting into you harshly, a quick rhythm picking up and your fingers welded into the sheets to keep yourself from hitting your head against the headboard. Your orgasm came crashing through you and you clenched around him as he buried into you with desperation.

“Fuck yeah, all for me.” His mouth dropped open with a low drawn out groan and his eyes squeezed shut as he came in you, his eyebrows furrowing as his orgasm cascaded through him. He shallowly pumped into you, mixing the cum with your arousal and you whimpered at the feeling as you came down from your high. He pulled out with a quiet sigh, gently bringing himself down to kiss you promptly and laying on top of you with his head on your chest. 

A couple minutes later, you felt his fingers trace over your burn mark that had scarred over on your arm. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.” 

You looked down at him, his eyes fixated on the mark and you tousled his hair a bit as you smiled at him. Exhaustion had begun to take over your senses and you yawned as you spoke. “It’s okay, I’m just happy that you were on the same train.” 

“That’s not what I meant.” Gojo was quiet, his eminence surrounding you in a veil. “Please don’t leave.” 

“I wasn’t going to in the first place. You had already changed my mind when you said something about me not surviving in the clan.” 

He was quiet for a minute, registering what you just said. Then, you heard a cheeky laugh erupt from him.

“So, my dick wasn’t what changed your mind, huh. Guess we have to start over, don’t we?” He said with a smirk holding in his voice and everything he had just felt, the sorrow and the panic disappeared as he started to kiss down your chest. He pinned your wrists down as he hauled himself back into a good position, face to face with you. Maybe you could get used to the piercing brightness of his eyes, the turquoise loving and cordial and everything in between staring back at you in the way you’ve always wanted.

“Gojo Satoru, you’ve got quite a big ego don't you?”

“Perks of being the one and only.” He pressed a light kiss on your lips, his hands brushing over your body. “Well, maybe not for long.”

a/n: wanna get tagged in future writing posts? join my taglist!

[julia4today]

the return of arthur pendragon - angst?? PT. 1

this is basically purely backstory, i needed to get something outtt (merlin x arthur)

a/n: this is probably the longest thing I've ever written. +I wrote this on a computer so everything is capitalized n stuff. and i want to say that im really sorry this is delayed and also the first thing ive posted in like two months. that's really on me. additionally, i have a reader x hobie fic coming out soon.

if you have sent me a request I WILL get to it, some may require more research and brain power. announcments: i have an ao3 (i havent posted anything on it though) pendragonco

Most imagine the afterlife to be a wonderland full of radiant flora and a deity only decided by yourself. A place where you may live out the years you never got to experience. But you would be wrong.

The truth is far more complex. It is a realm where echoes of your past deeds and dreams intertwine with the fabric of eternity. Time flows differently, like a river winding through the core of memories and contrition, where every choice made in life reverberates on the very existence of the universe. There are no simple paradises or solitary deities here, but rather a tapestry of existence woven from the threads of every life that comes before and leads after yours.

However, to Arthur Pendragon, both definitions seem untrue. It almost taunts him with how easy they make being dead seem to a new generation of the dead and the living.

To King Arthur, the afterlife is a treacherous wasteland, where the dead seemed unnaturally content despite their recent quietus. All he could do was curse his demise and all the unfulfilled ambitions that haunted him. He wondered about his darling Guinevere, how she fared, now tasked with ruling Camelot in his stead. He thought of the fate bestowed upon Gaius, the man he had trusted implicitly, who now carried the weight of the living through Pendragon's legacy.

But above all, his thoughts always returned to Merlin. A man he had once known. A man he had once trusted. Arthur imagined Merlin. Perhaps Merlin was so grief-stricken he never used his power again? Maybe he avenged the death of his king. For all Arthur knows, Merlin himself could've died, he too could have been cursed to this desolate ether. 

In reality, the world broke. His world broke. The once and future king, the man destined to unite the land of Albion, through magic and none, is now dead. Merlin, day after day, ran his last moments over. Cursing himself for the way Arthur left this world. If he had just listened to Kilgaraah if he had heeded his advice. If he had disposed of Mordred the first time they had met, the King would stand before him long after. No war would have ensued, and Camelot would no longer be in strife with war.

The day his death was announced to the citizens was a dismal one. Clouds cast over the town square, and the whole of the city gathered to hear the words from the queen herself. Gwen and Merlin stand where Arthur had stood just weeks prior. Where Arthur had announced war, Gwen shall announce the outcome of such a thing. 

“My dearest citizens of Camelot,” Her voice wavers. “It is with a heavy heart that I make this declaration. Our beloved king, Arthur Pendragon, has fallen in battle. The king lives no more. His bravery and dedication to our kingdom will forever be remembered. Let us unite in mourning his loss and uphold his legacy with strength and resilience. May his soul find an eternal peace” A long silence befalls Camelot. The only noise was the occasional strangled sob. Coming from townsmen and nobles alike. The knights stood on only one knee. Taking their solemn oath to the King to heart.

In the months that followed the death of the King, Merlin withdrew into solitude, seeking solace in the quiet corners of Camelot and the vast expanses of the surrounding countryside. Memories of Arthur haunted him—laughter shared over campfires, battles fought side by side, and the unspoken bond of friendship that had defined their lives. He found himself replaying every moment, every decision, wondering if there had been a different path—one that could have spared Arthur's life.

In the privacy of his chambers, Merlin poured over ancient texts and scrolls, searching for clues, signs, anything that might point the way to Arthur's return. His magic, once hidden away in fear of persecution, now burned within him with a fierce intensity—a testament to the depth of his devotion and determination. He thought of his previous journey with Arthur, a trip in which Arthur came back fuming at Uther. A trip where they had met with Ygraine, Arthur's mother.

He wonders what spell Morgause had used to conjure the image. Whether or not the image was manipulated, didn't matter so much to Merlin. If he could only see Arthur one last time. One more day. If he could apologize for his secrecy, if he pledged his allegiance to the king, if he could promise to carry out whatever plan Arthur had for Camelot, he would be content. Merlin had believed that if he could just find the right spell, he could bring back the king. Even if only for a short period.

Deciding this was easy for Merlin. Evoking Arthurs image not so much.

----

OKAY, i promise i will get part two out soon. my hobie fic comes out on sunday so

@maumnuu - this is mainly for you :p

[thoughts-of-a-trying-tree]

I posted 163 times in 2022

That's 151 more posts than 2021!

12 posts created (7%)

151 posts reblogged (93%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@sarah-sandwich

@the-gayest-tree-you-ever-did-see

@shipskicksandgiggles

@thoughts-of-a-trying-tree

@innovationoftransspider-man

I tagged 103 of my posts in 2022

Only 37% of my posts had no tags

#fic rec - 36 posts

#parkner - 25 posts

#omelet fic - 16 posts

#the tree speaks - 15 posts

#marvel - 11 posts

#transferred tags → - 8 posts

#spiderman - 7 posts

#spiderlad - 5 posts

#harley keener - 3 posts

#peter parker - 3 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#omg.............. i will write these................... i will........................... number six will make me scream i will write these

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

commitment to a fic is when you change your emoji colors for the characters and forget to change them back

3 notes - Posted February 21, 2022

#4

lmao okay this is such a me thing to do but anyway

remember the announcement i was talking about? yk, the one i never spoke of again? yeah so..... i have an ao3 account!! super exciting, i can leave kudos twice (more if i try hard enough) and its been lovely overall, but ive moved all the fics that i like there (a grand total of four out of... more than four) and from here on out, all my fics will be published there a little earlier than theyre posted here, which some of yall may already know bc i linked it on marry me (teehee check it out lolsies) and its in my bio but!! i fuckin forgor!!! to announce the announcement!!

toodloo, i just wanted to make sure everyone knew!

3 notes - Posted January 5, 2022

#3

writing is just ooh a new fic idea ooh a new fic idea ooh a new fic idea ooh a new fic idea ooh a new fic idea ooh a new fic idea ooh a new fic idea ooh a new fic idea ooh a new fic idea ooh a new fic idea ooh a new-

8 notes - Posted January 18, 2022

#2

liability

word count: 836

warning(s): lots of angst, hurt with comfort, relationship issues, cursing, an argument

Read on AO3

-----------------------------------------------

Songs were something that could get caught in Harley's head easily, but conversations never stayed. They were too fleeting, too quick, and he was too spontaneous for them to ever even make sense, much less be remembered.

When he and Peter started dating, he tried desperately to hoard every word, to keep every cadence in his mind, because one thing he could remember were the lessons he learned and one he could never forget was that everyone left. He didn't want Peter to leave but that wasn't something he could control, so at the very least, he could make the memories stay.

And then Peter started leaving and leaving and leaving and coming back and leaving and every time he did, he would always remember another lesson he learned too young, the lesson that you have to leave before you get left.

It's like a song, that one cynical dance of words playing in his mind over and over, a background track to an argument he should've seen coming.

What the fuck are you doing to yourself? Can't you stop? For me?

It's not that easy.

You don't have to do everything you can do just because you can! Take a goddamn break, won't you?

I can't take a goddamn break, Jesus. Do you even hear yourself?

I don't think I'm asking for too much here. Oh, but he was, he was, he was.

You have to leave before you get left.

No, of course you don't.

See the full post

29 notes - Posted February 28, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

marry me

word count: 2712

warning(s): references to fics i've never written, cursing, dialogue heavy, and my brand of self-indulgence (also the word uwu is said. im so sorry)

Read on AO3

-----------------------------------------------

"Peach, toss me the wrench, would you?" Clang! "Thanks, and also the—" Clang! "Oh, yep, that's better actually." Bzzzzzzzt. "Perfect, marry me." Thwack! "I meant thank you!"

'*'*'*'

"Harleyyyy! HAAARLEEEEEYYYY!"

"What? Where's the invasion?" Slap!

"Pick your stupid fuckin' socks up! Tits and their respective gods, I have to do everything around here and there ain't no pay in New York Cit-ay."

"You could always marry me for tax benefits if you're that worried—"

"And pick your stuff up for the rest of my life? I would rather eat my shirt. Better not see anything in the lab!"

"Mhm."

"..."

"…"

Wham! "Harley Fuckin' Keener, why did you leave YOUR socks on MY stuff? Stop laughing!"

'*'*'*'

See the full post

62 notes - Posted January 4, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[elytrafemme]

ok firstly HI. HI HI HI <333 HI :D

REALLLLL RAEL ASF okay my faves would be like: dog years, letter to God (1974), the end, letter to God (1983), lonely is the muse, arsonist, life of a spider (draft), letter to God (1998)

I LUV READING UR THOUGHTS ON ONLY LIVING GIRL IN LA & HOMETOWN ESPEC when i have listened to the album those two have not been my faves but like... I appreciate the opening being a six minute song u are so real for this and also hometown the refrain the way she sings it is like DEVASTATING augh. Ugh. YEAH!

DOG YEARS IS CRAZY when she was dropping the insta promos i was like oh this is going to be devastating to the culture and it WAS. it's kind of unlocked things in me i fear its like soo good.

EXACTLY EXACTLY WITH THE LETTERS TO GOD EXACTLY!!!!!!!! I think 1983 was my OG fave and agree that i dont love 1998 as much but i think like... first of all crazy cool conceptually to have those but the progression going thru it like u said of I wanna be sick I don't wanna be somebody they're tryna get rid of -> I don't wanna be sick I don't wanna be somebody you're wanna get rid of -> You have to be sick I've finally found somebody I don't wanna get rid of . ACTUALLY SEVERELY FUCKED UP OF HER.

the end originally didnt hit as crazy for me and then i relistened to it when the album dropped and i was like what the FUCK man. ending the song on "my treatment starts today" and also making that the first single is genuinely like. halsey u are a fucking genius

Darwinism is such an incredible track when i was first listening to it i was like. the snippet led me in one direction and then i heard the song and was like this is a different direction and iactually love where they took this and i also love them. like musically such an incredible song

LONELY IS THE MUSE IS MY TOP SONG THIS YR IM SO SURE OF IT ive not been listening to it as much since the album dropped (ill explain in a moment) but it is one of the best songs ever written imo. so where do i go in the process when i'm just an apparatus <- this lyric is maybe my fave but even just the refrain being i always knew i was a martyr and that Jesus was one too but i was built from special pieces that i learned how to unscrew so i could always reassemble to fit perfectly for you or anybody that decides that im of use (i might have mistyped some of that srry) like THEY GET IT. THEY FUCKING GET IT!!!! When i first heard it i was like oh halsey just transcribed my life crisis rn ok cool awesome. and then its all i listened to

Shout out to arsonist when i heard a song was going to be fiona apple inspired i was SO EXCITED and like. Fuck. that song is so crazy good i love it so bad. i love the different directions they took all these songs in theyre so unique like fuckkkkk

life of the spider is quite seriously the only thing i have listened to since the album dropped. like occasionally ui'll listen to TGI or like... Two other songs. but i have been looping life of a spider nonstop. u understand me halsey understands me but like this song... again is like oh let's just transcribe mare's current thought process and life crisis and make it a beautiful incredible song and im like okay no for sure. cause i'm the spider in the kitchen weaving webs through every year and i worked real hard on the last one but the last one got me here i'm minding my own business but my presence makes you curse i should be getting better but i'm only getting worse and God how dare i even thinking of choosing here to die cause then i'm just a problem that you have to take outside <- GENUINELY THE MOST INSANE LYRICS EVER WRITTEN. BEST LYRICS EVER WRITTEN. I love this fucking song top 5 songs ever for me like. fuck them seriously for this but also. God. GOD.

NO NO NO TRUE LIKE I FEEL LIKE UGh so much artistry was put into this album they put so much care into every song!!! which is why even though there are some songs that are not as faves for me (only living girl hometown & hurt feelings i am so sorry beautiful beautiful nation) this album is truly a no skip and every single song especially those three have so much love and vision put into them. i'm literally writing a zine article abt this album and im like i have so much shit to say how do i even do this........ also i appreciate what u said about the album order bc i was originally on the fence about whether it was like Purposefully ordered but reading ur thoughts and thinking through it like. yeah! yeah. there's nothing i would change here.

and on the tiktok note genuinely like while halsey obviously does write bops and is a pop artist so they have songs on this album that are like... ego and panic attack where i can see this being like The Hits, it's also so important that this album really ISN'T made to be like a host for a bunch of radio hits. so many of these songs are not palatable for that! they're honest and brutal in a way that can't be easily like commercialized and i dont know thats really meaningful to me too

SORRY THIS IS SUCH A LONG RESPONSE but i love hearing ur thoughts on music always i am a very loyal arowrath post reader and i saw all ur stuff about TGI and im like well i need to be brave and reach out to him its very imperative for me at this time. sorry for my lengthy yap hehe i hope u are doing so well beams at u!!! <3333333

ps i havent heard any of the extra tracks or the vma performance hwich i need to because my friend told me that victoria de angelis from måneskin is bass for that performance and like i gotta be there man. i gotta

i have been deeply appreciating ur TGI posting and was wondering what ur fave songs off of it are !! - mare

HI MARE im free from academia for the day (FINALLY) so i can answer this yayayaayy

as of right now. and this is in album order And im about to list off like a good third of the album sorry in advance but: only girl living in la, dog years, letter to god 1974, letter to god 1983, darwinism, lonely is the muse, and life of the spider

first of all. only girl living in la is an INSANE way to start an album. Like i knew i was absolutely in for it seeing the track list and that we were Starting with a 6 minute long song i was like Oh she loves me specifically she knew id been tormented by songs that are 2 minutes long for too long. i dont think ive ever finished the first song on an album and been, like, scared to listen to the rest of it before (good thing)

dog years. i canteven say anything yet Like theres no words. probably one of my favorites out of my favorites

letter to god 1974 and letter to god 1983 are twins to me. (well triplets shoutout letter to god 1998 no disrespect to my girl its just the first two are my faves personally) Thank u halsey for addressing the "wanting to get really sick so people would pay attention to you" to "getting really sick and it turns out people kinda dont gaf if ur in ur 20s about it" pipeline

hometown- is anyone else trying so hard to escape their hometown or is it just me and halsey and gerard "i know im never getting out of belleville" way. also i love her voice on this one

darwinism- i was reading it as being about physical disability but apparently she said it was about neurodivergence either way is anybody else feeling ostracized from the rest of society or is it just me and halsey out here

lonely is the muse- INSANE FUCKING SONG vocally lyrically musically everything. when i found out there was gonna be a Whole Album and lonely is the muse was on it i realized i was going to die.and then i did. <3

life of the spider- i knew there was a tori amos song on the album and the one tori amos song im really familiar with is me and a gun so of course i was terrified .and i was right to be. love a song i cant listen to without having a panic attack one of my favorite genres. insanely haunting song i cant really listen to this one casually yet or possibly ever i have to like sit down and prepare. this morning i saw a spider in my bathroom and started crying. tomorrow more of the same. "favorite" not in the way where i listen to it a lot favorite in the way where i can barely listen to it at all

also one more thing i feel like in general the album is organized very well does that make sense. like the songs are in a specific order that is good and makes sense. only girl living in la -> ego -> dog years -> letter to god 1974 is an insane run of songs generally let alone first on the album but also it like. makes sense why theyre in that order. also darwinism -> lonely is the muse -> arsonist -> life of the spider i can say the same of. like yeah thats the exact order those songs should go in. this is really not a Shuffling Album to me at ALL theres a specific order they all go in and i really like that Bc half the time These Days it feels like everythings so focused on having 2 minute long songs with 15 second clips that blow up on tiktok that its always nice to have an album thats like. Ok thankgod they actually give a fuck about this and its not optimized for social media analytics

thank u for reading My essay ^___^<3 u sent this 5 hours ago when i was working on my school stuff and i waslike oh thank god i get to talk about music later. A little treat for meeee to rewind and such.And then immediately i wrote A lot of sentences but, like, for fun this time so it counts as Rewinding

[snusbandxknifewife]

Could you do a oneshot where Vivi forces Jude and Taryn to wear revealing outfits and Madoc decides he’s joining them. This is an after QON Headcanon. Of an overprotective daddy Madoc giving dead glares to anyone to anyone who approaches his twin daughters

I know it’s been a few days but I promise I didn’t forget! Also imma just warn you here and now this is CURSED. (Also I just realized you said headcanon. I wrote it as a fic I hope that’s ok)

~~~~~

Daddy Daughter Dance

Three years of exile and the unwavering support of his wife had hardly softened Madoc to the mortal world. He found mortals to be dirty and unstable, far too lowly to interact with his family.

Vivienne Duarte thought it was absolutely hilarious and, while she might not always agree with what her sister does, she thought that banishing Madoc had been some of Jude finest work. She couldn’t have thought of a better way to pull the rug out from under her faerie father’s feet, and it filled her with pride at how masterfully her sister had dealt with dear old dad.

Still, having her father perpetually around was starting to annoy Vivi. He got bored and decided that the best thing to do would always be to go knocking on his eldest daughter’s door, asking her what was up and how she was doing. She was starting to go insane, and she desperately needed an out.

Then, as she was sitting at the dinner table during one of Madoc’s forced family meals, when Taryn longingly mentioned wanting a night off from the baby, she had a spark of an idea.

Taryn had showed up with Ghost and her toddler, a darling little girl named Ellanora. Jude had finally relented and agreed to come along for supper, Cardan naturally right behind her. Heather was being her absurdly supportive self, Oak had finally reached the point of his life where he was prone to teenage mood swings and he was hiding in his room, Oriana looked like she was fraying at the edges.

“Ladies,” she brightly began, her wicked smile spreading from ear to ear, “I believe it has been far too long since we had a night out on the town!”

“We’ve never had a night out on the town,” Jude pointed out, a brow raised at the ton her sister was taking.

“Then surely it’s been too long!” Vivi shot back, standing up from her chair so quickly that it shot out behind her and slammed into the wall. “Come now, Jude. You know that you and Taryn won’t be able to visit forever! Why not take a night off and celebrate the joys of the mortal world with your loving family?”

Heather hid her laughter by taking a sip of her water. She’d seen this look on Vivi’s face before and she just knew that chaos was waiting in the wings.

Taryn, bouncing her child on her leg, looked over to Ghost. They’d married about six months prior and they were still in the lovey-dovey-heart-eyed stage of love. “I would love to, Vivienne, but Ellanora needs to—“

“Surely Ellanora’s daddy can watch her? This is a girl’s night, after all,” she grinned. “No Cardan, Garret, Madoc, or Oak allowed!”

Jude scowled and Cardan pouted, Taryn blanched and Ghost quirked his head, Oriana pursed her lips and Madoc went thunderous.

Oh this was going to be perfect.

“I don’t think—“

“Oh Jude, come on! You and Taryn won’t be able to hang out with us forever, let loose tonight and have some fun! You already left Elfhame,” Heather swooped in and Vivi could get on one knee and propose right there.

Vivienne gave no chance for anyone else to complain, standing with a sense of finality and moving towards Oriana’s walk-in closet. Oriana was always dressed for a night out and she and Heather both looked bangin’, but Taryn was dressed like a tired mom and Jude was still wearing her practice leathers.

Heather must have been working magic back in the dining room, because by the time she’d picked out outfits for the twins, both were standing behind her. Taryn appeared to be bouncing with excitement, desperate for a night away from the baby. Jude looked perturbed, as she typically was when she was separated from Cardan.

Neither woman complained as they stripped and dressed. Taryn had always loved her fashion and Jude had really come into her own in the past few years, her husband’s doting doing wonders for her confidence.

Still, as they looked in the mirror in Oriana’s closet, Jude raised a brow at her older sister.

Taryn was wearing a high waisted skirt and low-cut shirt combo, heels stolen from Oriana making her calves look gorgeous and her ass pop. Jude was in a slinky dress, just barely hitting her thigh with the back falling open down her spine.

If Jude were a betting woman, she’d say Vivi was trying to make their father have a heart attack.

As they walked out of the closet and towards the front door, they ran into Heather and Oriana, both smiling knowingly. Just as they were about to leave, Madoc walked into the living room.

And his jaw hit the floor.

Of course he was used to the faerie brand of risqué clothing, but mortal clothes are a far cry different. They’re abrasive, choppy, far too high cut and low quality. What the fuck did Vivi think she was doing?

“Bye dad! We’re going to Bare Assets!”

Then the girls were out the door. Off to the closest night club they could get to. Bare Assets was a local strip club with both male and female strippers, a fantastic bar, and a separate dance floor that Vivi and Heather frequented when they wanted to act out.

“What’s Bare Assets?” Madoc screamed back into the dining room, scaring Ghost and Cardan—who had been cooing over Ellanora and trying to get her to eat her broccoli.

“The strip club where Jude and I had our joint bachelor and bachelorette party a few years back,” Cardan nonchalantly offered, almost immediately catching his slip up and clamping his mouth shut.

Unfortunately, Ghost, who was thoroughly distracted by his adopted daughter, didn’t catch the way Madoc’s eyebrow was twitching. “I remember that night! I got on the pole and some random stripper licked my nipples.”

“I don’t think you should say that in front of your kid—“ Cardan started.

“Nipples!” Ellanora, who had recently started imitating words she heard adults say, interrupted. Cardan hid his laughter with a cough; let Ghost explain to Taryn why his daughter was yelling about nipples.

Then, as the front door slammed shut, both men looked back up. Madoc was gone.

They shared a look and (wisely) decided to stay with Ellanora.

Vivi had been banking on Madoc following them, just like she’d been banking on him getting lost long enough to give them time to do a shot or two each. This was a woman who had nearly two decades put into annoying her father: she was an absolute expert.

They were dancing when she heard a scream by the front door and she started grinning like a madwoman. In the back, where the DJ was blasting dubstep and the dance floor was a living thing, she knew they had a few minutes left before Madoc would be able to fight his way through the strippers and past the bar.

Oriana was busy learning how to do the robot from Heather while Taryn and Jude jumped around to the best of the music. It made Vivi happy how the twins had reconciled over the past few years. It was nice seeing them get along in ways they never really had before.

When a hand clapped on her shoulder, she wasn’t surprised at all. She turned with a wicked grin and cane face-to-chest with her furious father. She was just about to say something snarky when her father bellowed, his voice vastly overpowering the music.

“WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST PUT IN MY DAUGHTER’S DRINK?”

Vivi sounds around, her eyes catching on the plastic cup in Taryn’s hand that she’d previously missed. Just beyond the drink was a man who appeared to be in his mid-twenties, a small plastic bag held in his shaking hand.

Taryn looked down at her drink and realized this stranger had been trying to drug her and absolutely no one had noticed. The environment must’ve been too loud and unfamiliar for Jude to see, Oriana would’ve never noticed, Vivi was too far away.

Her lip curled in disgust and she threw the contents of her roofied drink all over her would-be drugger, grabbing her twin to keep her from gutting the bastard and moving over to where Madoc was fuming.

Vivi was shaking and Heather was trying to explain what just happened to a very confused Oriana. Jude was quickly checking all the exits and making mental notes of everyone’s face, the nightclub now a battleground.

“How dare you?” Madoc spin Vivienne back around as he roared. “How could you put your sisters at risk? You know how dangerous it is for them!”

Vivienne hadn’t even thought, she’d been so busy trying to irk her father that she hadn’t even considered Jude and Taryn weren’t raised here, they wouldn’t know to cover their drinks. The mortal world would be just as dangerous for them, only in different ways.

Madoc went to scream some more at his eldest daughter, but Taryn stopped him with a gentle hand to his wrist. She was always the best at getting him to smile and calm down.

“It’s okay, dad. We’re safe, it wasn’t Vivi’s fault.”

She goes to say something else, but a bouncer works his way through the crowd before she can, thanking Madoc for his help and telling him they’d caught the man and kicked him out. When the bouncer offers to let Madoc drink on the house, Taryn pipes up and accepts for him.

“Taryn I don’t think—“

“Oh come on, dad! You can’t spend your whole life hating everything mortal,” she announced as she rolled her eyes. “Let us help acclimate you while we still can.”

“With you and Jude glowering at everyone, we won’t have to worry about anyone bothering us,” Oriana observes with a small smile as she walks over to her husband’s other side.

Before Madoc can say anything else, he has some terrible cocktail in his hand and he’s surrounded by all the women in his life as they do the robot. (Jude would’ve preferred to keep bouncing up and down, but Oriana was insistent.)

So Madoc spends the rest of the night drinking and eventually dancing in a den of mortals, watching over his daughters and glaring menacingly at anyone who even thinks about looking at them. Oriana started stealing his drinks and Heather and Vivi disappeared into the bathroom, Jude and Taryn watched in fascination as a stripper insisted on teaching Madoc to twerk, and none of them had to worry about checking their drinks again.

~~~~~~

Am I sorry about writing a fic where Madoc twerks? Yes. Also I specified the strip club because ya bitch is writing a bachelor/bachelorette party fic at the strip club and yes Ghost gets his nipples licked by a stripper I’m also sorry about that one.

Tag list: @cardan-greenbriar-tcp @hizqueen4life @slightlyrebelliouswriter23 @thewickedkings @aelin-queen-of-terrasen @cheekycheekycheeks @queen-of-glass @b00kworm @doingmyrainbow @andromeddea @jurdanhell @thesirenwashere @sweetlyvillainous @clouds-and-peonies @clockworkgraystairs

[xiaoshng]

picking flowers w/ genshin characters

diluc , bennett , zhongli , albedo , /

gn!reader

warnings : none ( very, very little cursing )

word count : 797

a/n : I've never written for anyone seriously before..., bare with me alright ^^

diluc ragnvindr

theres two things that this man would do while picking flowers with you

"y/n...are you sure this place is safe to start our flower picking.?"

"why wouldn't it be..- holy shit what is that"

"...get behind me."

you've seen this man in his voice lines, all he does is just worry about your well being

while you're looking for the flowers you absolutely adore ( lets just ignore your pollen allergy for a little ok)

you feel a tap on your shoulder

the only person you'd expect, would be diluc ( who else would it be - kaeya )

he holds out a simple bundle of red flowers, covering his face with his other hand

"diluc, how about you hold my hand for a bit? you seem a bit anxious..." he looks down at your extended arm, waving your hand a bit in the air. "remember what i told you about wandering around dangerous places..?" he takes your hand in his and gives it a light squeeze. "what's so dangerous about this lovely flower field.., how about we look around for some flowers diluc?" you look behind your shoulder, smiling, trying to convince the red head. "alright...maybe just for a few alright?"

"roses...for you. I thought these were fitting for our day-out, as they represent love."

bennett (platonic)

"y/n, over here! there's plenty of- why are they all dead weeds?"

"oh bennett..."

It was extremely difficult, impossible even to find a beautiful flower field for both of you to reside in, possibly due to his horrible luck

"Im sorry y/n... there doesn't seem to be any-" "bennett look!"

you both stood in front of a small garden of a variety of flowers

It was a miracle

( you both even cried a few tears )

"y/n, look at these!" bennett points out a certain pale yellow flower. "I've seen those before! hm... razor told me about those a few days ago! they said these flowers were about friendship and trust...so ive decided to pick some to give to you. hopefully, they don't die though..." he rubs the back of his neck sheepishly while handing you the messy mass of freesia that were once in his hands.

"thanks for inviting me out today with you. not many people do that and I really appreciate it..."

zhongli

"did you know that glaze lilies were always my favorite?"

"they’re extremely elegant zhongli, just like you i'd say?"

"you flatter me too much."

the best choice to go flower picking with I swear, hes the most peaceful man ever

would go on about the meanings of different meanings and different types of flowers

you both would be lying down on a clear patch as he discussed about his favorite flower

you could probably even fall asleep to his soothing voice

"you look beautiful today, y/n." zhongli turns on his side, looking at your side profile. you were currently looking at the sky, trying to find possible shapes and animals in them. after you heard his words you looked back at him and smiled. "continue talking about them zhongli, I dont mind at all." you gesture him to continue on with his little talk about glaze lilies. "you were listening? I don't ever want to be a bo-" "go on zhongli, I love it when you go on your tangents, its cute." you look back at him, expectant, picking up a tiny flower and inserting it into the side of his hair.

"thank you for always being here for me. I dont know where i'd be without you."

albedo

"...why would you want to go out to find flowers when I could just make us some..?"

"I want it to be more special 'bedo, just this once, me and you?"

"I guess I could get that arranged..."

would definitely not get it at all at first

after some contemplation and convincing, he wanted it to be somewhere tranquil and serene

he didn't want anyone to interrupt his time with you, so it seemed more like a bodyguard than a small little date

"albedo, you look so stiff. Is everything alright? " you take a quick peek back at the alchemist. "you wanted to pick flowers, so I calculated how l-" " don't analyze this too much albedo, all I wanted was for you to take a break from your experiments." you take a quick deep breath. "It seemed like you needed it." his eyes widen a bit and he stepped forward grabbing your hand. "I apologize. I won't do it again." he sulks for a few seconds, slowly forming a smile after while placing something in your hand. a cecilia.

"I appreciate you trying to help me loosen up a bit. maybe taking a break with you isn't all that bad once in a while."

[jinmukangwrites]

You're back!! How I've missed you

Nsjdks kinda!! I'm happy you missed me though, I missed y'all too! I've just been really focused on my original work lately, and catching up on books that have similar vibes to the kind of book I want to write. I'm a sponge with writing, so if I keep reading things similar to what I want to write, it'll give me a small advantage instead of running head first into it.

I'm still on Tumblr though, mostly just on my main account. However I do want to write a drabble on LU some time just to keep warmed up on writing. I've gotten ideas for something from @mmmwafflesart's cursed asks yesterday, and I'll let them fear what exactly those ideas are :3

[garrothromeave]

the hell is mystreet season 6??

(warning, long post ahead)

ok so before i start this

1) ive never posted shiiiit on tumblr before so watch me suffer, im just here to talk about stuff that my friends who dont know anything about aphmau have to listen to me rant about for hours on end

2) i havent seen mystreet in like years (except season 3, i watch that frequently since im laurance and shadow knight deprived) so please bear with me because i might be completely wrong on this lol. it’s just like, pointing out things i remember

3) im sure someones already talked about this but who cares

4) im gonna do this stupid thing where i just explain myself a bit at first, if you dont want to read that just skip to the part where you see “the actual thingy:” in bold and italics 

5) mild disclaimer; i am completely aware that jessica is not a professional writer. i know that she did her best to appeal to her fans, and honestly, respect for that. while this post will come off as aggressive and probably look like hate, that’s not my intention in the slightest. it’s just... intense criticism. im sure y’all probably already know that, but yeah, just stating that anyways. i do believe that jess is doing her best, and in no way do i want to dismiss any hard work she’s done. that being said; prepare for a very strongly opinionated post.

haha watch there be 10000+ typos in this making me look like a complete dumbass

ok here we go 

one of the main reasons i stopped watching aphmau back in 2017 was the mess that was season 4. like, in the first few episodes of the emerald secret, i thought “woah!! this is kinda cool, im a sucker for mystery!” because of course i was, it was something new and something exciting. the only problem i had with it at the time was kim, but that’s just because i always found her annoying and out of place. i just didn’t understand why garroth dragged her along and honestly i still don’t to this day BUT, moving on.

anyways, as the season progressed, 13 year old me was of course just “:0!!” the entire time--that is, up until the reveal of the main villain. i remember watching the episode, seeing the reveal of ein, and then stopping. like, just for a quick break, but i was still just overwhelmingly disappointed. like, and this was the time when pdh was airing and ein just got made alpha (i think?) and i had really really liked eins character in pdh. either way, that really sucked and actually opened my eyes to a lot of things.

one of the main things bein’ the fact that this was supposed to be a slice of life kinda series that decided to take a turn to a more edgy kinda approach. which, i guess i regularly wouldnt mind? but seeing as mcd was kinda bein neglected at the time it just didnt sit right with me. BUT WHATEVER, point is i stopped watching mystreet all together at the end of season 4.

like, a whole year later my brother tells me that shit’s getting intense in season 5 + 6 of mystreet, and my brilliant self decided to give it a shot--but i refused to watch all of season 5, so i only stepped in when ein made an appearance. so whenever that was, that’s where i picked up because i didnt care enough to see 

and y’know--i honestly didn’t hate it at first. in fact, i found it oddly cool. it wasn’t enough to get me into aphmau again, but it was enough to where i was intrigued. i dont know why, but i never watched the finale, so i didnt see the ending until just a few weeks ago--but back then, i thought it was neat. looking back on it however... im just so confused. 

side note: only got back into aphmau this time around because of mcd. mainly because like, i adore the first season and the first half of the second season. and being nearly 18 now, im a lot more appreciative of plot and well-written characters n junk. 

the actual thingy:

ok back on track. imma stop spilling out my story of how i got back into aphmau, and lets just skip to what rewatching mcd made me realize of season 6′s plot and shit:

-emmalyn. how the fuck does ghost even remotely exist? if she’s emmalyn as claimed, then why have we already seen emmalyn in the mystreet universe alive? look i get that creators can do whatever they want with their stories but at the same time please provide some sort of explanation good god. and maybe they did and i just havent seen it, so if there is one--let me know. but until that day imma just sit here confused as fuck

-ok so imma just be real, the whole ‘ultima’ thing is just... not great. in my opinion, anyways. like... i saw someone mention this in another post, but if this ultima stuff was like, a really big deal, why isnt it mentioned in mcd? though i suppose since its a curse of sorts, it could be later on past the time period in which mcd takes place--but even then, how did it manage to make its way into aaron’s family bloodline? 

-WHY IS EVERYONE AT STARLIGHT ITS JUST SO CONVINIENT like what happened to this place being the most expensive shit on the planet or whatever, and how the gang happens to run into like, the werewolf trio and blaze and kai and guy and nate all of these people like god damn life doesnt WORK LIKE THAT 

-im sorry but turning people into relics? thats... thats the best you could come up with? plus, like, how does that even work? in mcd it’s established that relics are separate entitles that choose their wielder, based on a ‘personal’ connection (being a descendent of a previous wielder) or if they’re a good match personality and (i think?) moral wise. so the whole turning-people-into-relics doesnt make much sense to be honest. 

-irene really over here using her god powers to only keep her friends alive like god damn not a great god if you ask me 

-can i talk about how incredibly predictable aphmaus death was? like i just kinda sat there waiting for it to happen and when it did i literally went “haha! wonder when she’ll be revived” because god forbid we actually kill off characters 

-when aphmau + demon warlock fought in the irene dimension there was no passage of time whatsoever in the real world whiiiiiiiiich really bothers me because they fought in there for at least a few minutes

-speaking of aphmau and the demon warlocks fight does it bother anyone else that it had to be aaron who took over the fight?? like we get it hes the big protector blah blah blah but god damn it wouldve been cooler if aphmau had fought this battle as her. aaron fighting this battle was so underwhelming

-...love. like, thats the only thing thats needed to break out of a forever potion? love? LIKE YEAH, GOOD GUYS GOTTA WIN SOMEHOW, but its just so cliche and overdoneeee

-oh yeah and also when travis went bonkers and became the demon warlock or whatever, why’d he only take over katelyn and garroth?? like, zane had been influenced by the potions in the past as well? DONT GET ME WRONG--i do love some good brother edge, but uh, the demon warlock was just bein kinda a dumbass by not possessing zane too just sayin’

-can aaron please go to fucking jail for mass murder now like holy shit, he just got sent home on a fuckin boat. also why did blaze forgive him for killing him thats not even remotely realistic. then again, nothing in mystreet has ever been realistic when it comes to characters and motives and personalities, (cough katelyn being actually abusive and travis being an actual pervert) but yknow whatever

-katelyn and kawaii chan literally added nothing to the plot whatsoever. like lets be real, katelyn lost her personality the moment season 5 started and kawaii chan just kinda sits there :I

-ok im sorry this was bound to come up but cmon guys imagine laurances potential if he was in season 6 like god damn this is beyond maddening. AND YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A REALLY REALLY COOL PARRALLEL?? IF IT WAS LAURANCE WHO SNAPPED GARROTH OUT OF HIS MIND CONTROL THING, because it would mimic laurance’s speech to get garroth to snap out of his rage in season 1, episode 100 of minecraft diaries. like how fuckin rad would that have been? missed opportunity 

-also?? why does kim/ghost know magicks?? like, if i remember correctly, emmalyn is a scholar--not someone who knew magicks. i mean, i guess research? study?? but its been established that knowing how magicks works =/= being able to use magicks. i dunno, just doesnt seem right i guess. maybe its explained, i wouldnt know (yes i know that makes me look like a dick leave me alone)

-melissa should have stayed dead. LIKE, NO, ITS NOT AS SIMPLE AS “haha it takes more than a few bullets to kill me”??? look ive got nothing wrong with melissa (cough lie cough) but yknow it would have just been cool a character... stay dead? for once? its just too fuckin cliche that shes alive god damn

-can i also just say the only good thing that came out of season 6 was travis’ dads sacrifice like damn that made me actually sad

-howww was lucinda turned into a relic. or yknow, anyone else? like im sure they explain it better in the actual show i just dont remember, but its just that easy? turning anyone into a relic? granted, a normal person wouldnt be able to produce a good relic, but idk man. IM JUST SAYING; that the only really powerful relics that aphmau should have been able to wield is the one that aaron + zane produced because shad relic and esmund relic moment. lucinda isnt even like, connected to a divine warrior. ALSO, another point, if its seriously that powerful of a relic getting one from just a magic user like lucinda, why go through the trouble? i mean i guess ofc youd want the “all powerful” one that the ultima produces but i mean damn whats the point

-ok this is just going to bother me but in one of the episodes (i think might have been in season 5 actually) where that like, guardian dude was chasing aphmau and zane and at one point they split up and the dude just chuckles at zane diverting paths and goes under his breath “youre not the important one here”, suggesting that aphmau somehow is? first of all, id argue that any ro’meave is significantly more important than aphmau was, especially not knowing much about her other than that shes with aaron. i might be missing some bits an pieces, but if i was that dude id forget about aphmau and go after zane 

-killing off derek for shock factor sucked, and i know the moment was supposed to be really sad because like “oh :( aarons dad is sacrificing himself for his son” but lets be real dereks still was a shitty father and i dont think his reasons for doing what he did was very good at all

-less about plot or more like: why the absolute fuck did the gang bring kim along instead of, oh i dont know, a life-long friend? like, laurance or dante maybe?? im sure its explained, i never saw aphmaus year or most of season 5, but god DAMN id hate to be apart of this friend group AND GOD LIKE, imagine reconnecting with an old friend who ends up getting closer to your best friends and taking priority in their lives over you (cough laurance) like god damn lol

-im just going to preface this one with: i dont remember everything that’s happened, so if im wrong i apologize in advance--but (you actually can correct me if im wrong and please do) didnt like, irene reincarnate her friends in order to give them better lives? I DONT KNOW IF THIS IS TRUE, ITS JUST WHAT I REMEMBER--however, if im correct, then:

a. why the hell would she bring back someone like zane, or gene, or ivy, etc.

b. why the hell do they all have the same exact names? first and last? again, im aware that the whole mystreet+mcd tie wasn’t originally supposed to be there, but i dont think that means such a coincidence can be excused? its just a bit much if you ask me.

c. why the hell is the fact that (as much as i literally hate this) aaron is a decedent of shad being ignored? like, you’d think that something like this would be something thats actually important, or something the demon warlock couldve taken advantage of. or are we completely erasing every other connections to divine warriors besides aphmau + irene? because even if irene did reincarnate them or do whatever it is she did, does she even have the power to sever the connections between them and their ancestors? my guess is, no.

d. speaking of irene why on earth was aphmau able to talk to/see irene, they’re literally the same person are they not? did she like, fuckin reincarnate herself without actually doing it?? BUT--i will give it to them, the demon warlock did refer to aphmau as something along the lines of being “one of the 3 parts of her broken soul” or something like that. however, my point still remains. also what are the other two did i miss that or is it never explained

now; if irene in fact did not ‘reincarnate’ her friends then please ignore that little bit right there :)

but yes, those are a few of the problems i have with season 6 off the top of my head. i would go into like, season 4 and 5 more as well, but i honestly didnt feel like it. at some point i might go into other things, like how important laurance could have been to the plot of these later seasons, or HELL, even dante. i might also go into what could have made season 4, 5, and 6 actually good--maybe... a rewrite? perhaps? but im getting too far ahead of myself, so i just leave you with this for now.

and i know that as soon as i post this 15 more things are just going to pop into my head BUT im going to try and not edit this post because why stress myself with that even more

anyways thank you for coming to my tedtalk 

[clonecaptains]

PAPERCLIPS | a Javi Peña x reader fic

rating: T for dramatic elements; will change to M in future parts

summary: You think your crush on Javi goes unnoticed - until Steve and Connie take matters into their own hands. 

a/n: ive had this story idea in my head for months and im so glad it’s finally out of my head and actually WRITTEN!! there will be a part two for sure, and others if i feel inspired!!

Paperclips

Being Javier Peña’s neighbor isn’t the worst thing to happen to you. Being a secretary at the DEA office is. Seeing Agent Javier Fucking Peña every day of the week is slowing killing you. His cute little ass in those tight ass jeans. He knows what he’s doing, and you hate him for it. The suits are just as bad. Displaying his broad shoulders, showing off his sharp jaw. You want nothing more than to yank him to your level by one of his ties and kiss him harshly. Yeah. You hate him.

But you won’t do anything about this hopeless crush. You haven’t done anything for weeks.

Your desk sits up higher, you look down at the boys from your perch. Javi’s desk faces away from you, which allows you to stare at the back of his head (and ass) all day. Every once and a while you get lucky and see his face when he leaves his desk to go out in the field, or when he comes into work in the mornings. He’ll turn and offer a nod or a simple wave good morning.

You are friendly acquaintances. You’ve spoken on occasion at the dreaded office parties. The only reason you ever have gone to those are the free food and the small chance to see him.

Your staring at the back of his head is the most you do lately, your crush too strong to get up the nerve to ask him for coffee. Luckily, he can’t see you pine away for him.

But unbeknownst to you, there’s a watchful pair of eyes that have seen your longing gazes at the back of Javi’s head.

One Steve Murphy.

He’s seen every glance. Every flustered look cross your face. He doesn’t want to pry, not at first. But then he remembers how his buddies set him up with Connie. And hell, Javi could use someone nice like you in his life. Someone less dangerous to get involved with than communist informants.

Steve’s told Connie every detail, it’s much more entertaining to discuss then the heavy topic of death and drug lords. Connie’s only concern is the office romance drama, but she’s your friend. And she wants the same thing for you – Javi is a good man. And being neighbors with you, she’s also seen the looks you’ve given as Javi walks down the hallway.

They are planning more on how to get you with Javi than you are.

So far, your plan is hoping he’ll need a paperclip and will come ask you for one. And then suddenly ask you to coffee and then take you back to his place and-

Oh shit.

Javi’s wearing a blue shirt today, your favorite. And you might have let your eyes linger a little too long. And you’ve just made eye contact with Steve. He quirks a brow at you, and a small smirk appears on his lips. His piercing gaze just past Javi makes his partner curious, and the object of your affections turns his head in your direction.

When Javi’s eyes meet yours, you quickly avert your gaze. Trying to busy yourself with something important. Which consists mainly of organizing your already organized desk.

Javi is none the wiser, he shrugs and goes back to work. But Steve, he saw all that he needed to see.

You spend the rest of the day with your head down. You’ve had enough embarrassment for one day. It pains you that you’re missing out on the blue shirt though.

Normally after work you come up with some excuse to try and say hi and bye to Javi on his way out. He almost never goes straight to his apartment after office hours because he’s typically working out in streets. It’s your small chance to get some form of interaction with him.

Tonight though, you get out of there as soon as possible. It kills you to leave, you can hear Javi and Steve laughing at their desks. You want to turn around and see that smile you dream of.

So instead, you get out and head home.

You look forward to a quiet evening. You need a distraction. Something, anything to keep your mind off of him. Which only seems to make you think about him even more.

It’s getting later and the wine in your system has you feeling warm. There’s a warm buzzed feeling that spreads over your body and settles between your legs.

Maybe the wine wasn’t such a good idea. And you’re being ridiculous. So, Steve saw you looking at Javi. Is that a crime? Javi is handsome. Most women in the office notice him, even the married ones get a little smile on their face when he walks by.

It’s more than that. Having your crush discovered isn’t the end of the world.

Maybe you know that if Javi was interested he would have done something by now. Maybe you know that if Steve tells Javi about your crush that something will happen. Or that something won’t.

You want to get over this crush, but all you can think about is the arousal between your legs. You’ve seen him bring women home, but it’s been some time. That’s given you a false hope you think. Regardless, you know he’s a good lover. Thin walls.

You ache.

Those nights when he’s brought a woman home have been awful. You don’t listen on purpose, and more often than not you wish you couldn’t hear. Couldn’t hear women scream out his name, wishing it were you crying out his name into the dark.

On top of all that, you know that most times when he brings someone home, it’s been a bad day for him. He brings a prostitute home to ease his sorrows with the high of a release. You want to be there for him not just sexually, but emotionally. Living next to him isn’t the worst thing, but not being able to help him when you’ve seen the weight he carries is.

You’ll see him at work the next morning and try not to pretend you didn’t hear the headboard thwacking and how much you wish it were you.

Yeah. That wine wasn’t a good idea.

You’ve created a fantasy which you entertain, maybe it’s wrong but right now the wine is talking. Your fingers tease yourself and you’re close to the edge when you hear a rapid knock on the door.

Feeling flushed and disoriented, you quickly tug your pants back on and hurry to open your door.

You’re met with the sight of a woman, obviously drunk.

“Is Javi here?” she laughs twirling her hair with her fingers. You feel sick.

“You have the wrong apartment,” you tell her and point to Javi’s front door across the hall.

Disrupted by the noise, Javi’s door opens. His eyes widen in slight shock at seeing the two of you talking. He pushes his door open, and this other woman walks past him into his place. His eyes flick up to you in a silent apology and he closes the door behind him with a click.

The silence in the hallway is deafening. You stand in your doorway in disbelief. You can hear muffled voices across the hall, and you slam your door behind you in anger. You wince at the slam, then you sink down to the floor. Tears fall from your eyes, who were you kidding?

You get no sleep that night, and every sound that drifts over from his apartment to yours fills you with dread. You’ve heard nothing sexual in nature, but that doesn’t make you feel any better.

You don’t even want to go to work. You don’t want to see him. You’re mad at him, even though you’re actually mad at yourself.

Most of the day goes by before you really get a chance to see him. And for that you are grateful.

You smell his cologne before you see him, and his tall frame hovers by your desk. His voice comes out gentle and raspy.

“I’m sorry about last night,” he starts. A small part of you hopes he’ll apologize for what it looked like, apologize for hurting you. “I’m sorry she disrupted your night.”

Oh.

“Thanks,” is your weak reply. You can’t even bear to look up at him. Shit, he smells really good too. He almost never comes up to your desk. And now that he’s here, you just want him to go away.

“Javi, I-“ you manage to look up at him. And you don’t have a clue what you’re gonna say. His eyebrows raise as he’s ready to listen to what you have to say.

“Great!” You hear Steve’s voice cut through. “I’m glad I got you both together!” he claps his hand on Javi’s shoulder. “Connie and I are having a little get together tonight, and we want you both to come! Be there at 7!” he squeezes Javi’s shoulder and gives you a nod and leave before you can tell him no.

Javi shakes his head but gives you a soft smile. “Connie’s cooking isn’t that bad,” he jokes getting a laugh from you. Even though you curse yourself for laughing, you’re still mad. But when you see him smile at your laugh, you’re not….completely mad.

You spend the rest of the day and afternoon panicking about what to wear. Who else was going to be at this “get together”?

You can only assume it’s a casual thing, but still. Knowing Javi will be there has your insides churning.

You arrive early to help Connie, and to compose yourself. You’re helping her to set the table when Javi walks in. He gives a polite nod, and Steve is quick to greet him with a beer.

You flush, and Connie sees you actively trying to avoid any looks. She gives you a gentle nudge with her elbow, getting you to look up at her.

“It’s alright,” she whispers. “He’s into you.” She looks over at the boys in the small living area. Javi’s shrugged his jacket and is sitting with Steve, one of them laughs at a joke.

You nod your head ‘no.’

“He isn’t,” you tell her with a small shrug. “Is this all that’s coming?” you ask trying to change the subject. It dawns on you then that this is a setup, a double date. You start to panic.

“Hey,” Connie’s words are soft but firm, “it’s just dinner.”

She’s right, and you know she is. But you’re not sure if you can handle looking at him. All you can think about is the woman who came knocking on your door last night and him taking her in. What else would she have been there for other than to get a little taste of Javier Peña?

It’s hard to avoid those big brown eyes when he’s sitting directly across from you at the table. The conversation is light and humorous. But the way Javi is looking at you, it’s as if he knows something. Like he can read your mind.

“Dessert?” Connie’s cheery voice tears you from your thoughts.

“I’ll help,” you tell her. You need air, you feel like you’re suffocating under his glances.

“I’d say it’s going well!” she giggles once the two of you are out of earshot in the kitchen.

“How can you even tell?” you groan. “He’s not into me Connie.”

“I don’t know, he’s been making eyes at you across the table.”

“Connie,” you hiss. “He is not into me. He brought home some woman last night. Why the hell would he be into me?”

“How do you know-“

“I know. I know!” you hiss sharply trying to keep your voice down. “He brings those women home for a fuck, I know I’ve heard! And I will NEVER be one of those women.”

And not that you want to necessarily be one of them, that he fucks only – but-

“He doesn’t want me.”

“Who said that?” Javi’s voice has you turn in the little kitchen. You almost drop the plate in your hands. Connie and Steve exchange a look. Your eyes are fixed on Javi. You wish the earth would swallow you whole.

Embarrassed and upset, tears start to well up in your eyes.

“C’mon,” Javi offers you his hand. Your arms are crossed tight against your chest, but at the softness of his voice you relax and take his hand. He guides you out of the apartment, and you turn to Connie – she gives you a smile and a nod saying, “it’s ok.”

So, you follow Javi. He guides you down the hall to his apartment. He pats his pocket but doesn’t feel his keys.

“Shit,” he laughs, “they’re in my jacket pocket-“

“We can go in mine,” you reply pulling out your keys and open your apartment door.

You’re not entirely sure what is happening, but you open the door and he follows behind.

“I didn’t bring her home for sex,” Javi tells you the moment the door closes behind him. “She’s an informant, she only pretended to be drunk so no one would be suspicious. Her idea, not mine.”

“So, you know?” your voice hesitant.

“Know what?” he leans against your kitchen counter. Your arms have crossed against your chest again.

“Know how I feel?” your face heats up.

“Yeah,” he chuckles softly. “I could feel your eyes burning the back of my head, and my ass,” he says out of the corner of his mouth. He gives a gentle wink, his eyes bright and eyebrows lifted.

You bury your face in your hands, “was I that obvious?”

“Honestly, I thought you were checking out Steve at first,” he laughs. Your laugh joins his, and you feel more relaxed. “The only reason I never said anything was-“ he nibbles on his lower lip trying to think of what he wants to say. “I thought you wouldn’t want me.”

“What?” you gasp. “How could you think that?”

“My life is fucked up baby, why would you want in the mess?” He takes a step closer.

“All I wanted was to be there for you,” you admit, fiddling with the hem of your jacket.

“That’s all you wanted?” he takes another step closer. You can feel the heat of him. You look up at his face, he’s standing so close. His brow is raised. “That’s all you wanted?” he repeats in a whisper.

“Javi,” you whisper and melt into him as he closes the gap between you with his lips. His mustache tickles your upper lip in the way you hoped it would.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers against your lips and kisses the corner of your mouth.

“You don’t have to explain,” you cling to his shirt. You start to laugh and press your forehead against his solid warm chest.

“What’s so funny?” he laughs.

“This isn’t how I thought this would happen.”

“Oh?” he raises that eyebrow again.

“I thought-“

“What?” he kisses your forehead and cheeks.

“I just thought you’d come up to my desk and ask me for a paperclip or something and then ask me for coffee.”

“Baby, I will ask you for a fucking paperclip if that’s what you want.”

You snort out a laugh and he squeezes you tight. He kisses you again, and you feel dizzy.

“I don’t do this. Ever,” you flush.

“It’s ok,” he whispers kissing you again, “all I came over for was a paperclip.”

//

MASTERLIST

[txbioglow]

Hi so about the request for the Light x L sister reader it can be Normal it doesn’t have to be Yandere is that okay ? 😀

𝗠𝗘𝗘𝗧𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗞𝗜𝗥𝗔

TYPE- oneshot (1.2k) THEATER- a STARRING- yagami light NOTE- k so like i lowkey had sm fun with this and i rlly loved this but like it’s the first thing that’s over 500 words that ive written in awhile so if it sucks omg im sorry. i left the ending up to imagination,, did they kiss or pull away or 👩‍🦯 anyway as u should y/n for not being a toy ur an independent woman period 💪💪

lightning cracked as the rain poured down, bouncing off the sides of y/n’s umbrella. something about the air was grim. well, at least that was what y/n thought as the funeral music blared. a casket was brought out, the casket of her late brother, known as l. imagine attending the funeral of your own brother, who was without a doubt viciously murdered. murdered for being the one to step up and attempt to catch kira. it was something scarring that a sister should hope to never have to go through; the death of a brother. however y/n didn’t seem to mind. sure she had a depressed facade, her face blotchy from crocodile tears, but deep down, she was jumping for joy. with l gone, killed by kira himself, no doubt, kira could finally rise up. rise and lead the new world.

so y/n sniffled and cried, earning pitiful looks from the small group attending l’s funeral. all was right in her world, though it may not seem that way. but y/n had to admit, there was one thing she just couldn’t piece together.

how did kira kill her brother? it had obviously been with a heart attack, but kira allegedly needed a name and a face to kill. l had been more careful than any, so how did kira get to him? that much she doubted she’d ever know.

yet just as if the gods had been listening, something caught her eye. a man in the back. he looked to be about the same age as her brother. the man had fair looks, he seemed decent enough. however the thing that caught y/n’s eye the most, every moment that the man believed no one was looking at him,  his somber expression turned into a smirk. he was shaking, not from tears, but a silent laughter. it was almost as if he were gloating. right there at l’s funeral.

y/n was sharp, she was easily able to come up with a reason for his laughter. one that explained the very thing she had been wondering. how did kira kill her brother? something told her that this man had something to do with the matter.

the service ended soon after, y/n made sure to take her time, allowing everyone else to leave before her.  eventually, the only two left in the room were the man she now knew as light, and y/n herself. light seemed like he was stalling, suspiciously finding as many things to do as he could. tying his shoe for example, or taking a mint from his pocket.

y/n of course saw through him. he had to be kira, there was no other explanation. light must’ve finally killed l, and now he wanted a moment. just to taunt l because he had won. y/n understood that well enough.

walking over to him, she smiled and tapped his shoulder. this was it, y/n was finally meeting kira himself; someone she had supported since the very beginning. “i have to admit, i didn’t exactly expect to see my brother’s killer at his funeral, kira.” she said slowly, letting it sink in.

light jumped a little, turning around to face her. he was shocked for a moment, but his relaxed smile quickly resurfaced. “me? that’s silly, i’m not kira. l was my friend, i could never kill my friend!” he laughed a little. 

y/n had to admit that he did sound convincing, like he was being truthful, however y/n could still tell that he was lying through his teeth. it takes one liar to know another. “you don’t have to hide it. i support kira, my brother got what was coming to him.” she smirked a little, laughing to herself for she could practically see the cogs turning in light’s head.

he was playing a dangerous game. what if he completely admitted to it, and it turned out to be a trick just so he would confess? she did seem sincere but he had to be careful. “ah i see,” he nodded his head, “and how did you come to that conclusion?”

“you laughed. you laughed in the middle of l’s funeral. either you’re mentally ill, or kira.” she stated, soundinng more and more confident. light cursed to himself under his breath, most likely having believed no one saw him. “observant. and what is it that you want from me? be careful what you say, i’m sure you know that i can kill you on the spot.” he grumbled, his innocent and charming persona fading.

“relax!” y/n said, giving light’s shoulder a pat, “i already told you, my brother got what he deserved. i’m simply happy with knowing who you are. and perhaps what your shinigami looks like if you’re feeling nice.” she flashed a smirk, pulling light in. 

something told him that she was different. different from all the other people he had used. light had to remind himself that she was nothing but an asset, someone to be used in order for him to get what he wanted.

he nodded his head, not breaking eye contact with her as he brought a piece of paper from his pocket. before y/n could react, light brushed the paper across her hand, revealing the large shinigami floating beside him. “kira at your service.” he grimaced softly, watching the woman before him lock her eyes on the creature.

so, who would’ve guessed, that l’s little sister y/n had been supporting him the entire time. that discovery could’ve been useful weeks ago. light could’ve made ages of progress, he could’ve been one step closer to creating his new world.

“i think that you could be useful” he said blatantly, confused as to why she scoffed at such an offer. “useful? so are you planning to use me? if you are, i’d play your cards right. i may support you, but i won’t throw myself at you.” she stated, bringing her face dangerously close to light’s. y/n had expected the shocked reaction that quickly flashed upon his face. he was surely used to women being infatuated with him and selling him their souls.

however he recovered quickly, “is that so? well, one plan foiled i suppose.” neither of them spoke. both seemingly mesmerized by the other. finally y/n spoke up, “i’m not sure what you’re planning, but if you think that somehow i could help you, then i think that could be arranged.” 

“and what is it that you want in return?” light shot back, still speaking quietly. “is it not enough to feel the satisfaction of helping a friend?” she inquired, in a teasing manner. something about the way she spoke, it made light feel differently. once again the idea that she was more than a tool entered his mind, but of course not. he would use her, and toss her aside when she was no longer of any worth. just as he did, and would eventually do to everyone else. there was no reason for her to be something more.

“hmm,” was the only thing he said, cupping her face in his hands. staring at her directly, their faces only inches from contact, “how interesting”

𝗪𝗘𝗘𝗞𝗟𝗜𝗘𝗦- @kaminology @zerohawks @nejihoe @lazcady @linak @kageyuwu 

[omegasmileyface]

Fic Writer Review

tagged by @ectolemonades and @floralflowerpower :)

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

4

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

7,988

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

on ao3 i've written for danny phantom and hlvrai. i have written for percy jackson and undertale in the past though

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

or four :)

Not in the Job Description (169 kudos)

Bound by the Food Chain (135 kudos)

Improvise. Adapt. Overcome (29 kudos)

Wagon Mound (7 kudos)

5. Which of your fic do you want more attention for?

i'd say Wagon Mound probably? though i understand why it doesn't have more attention, being that its an hlvrai fanfiction that has nothing ot do with hlvrai... kjefhkjrhjd though im most proud of Food Chain so maybe that one . idk i like the level of attention ive got :)

6. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

i try to respond to any comment that has more like , unique thought in it? not that i dont adore the generic ones!! i just dont feel i have anything valuable to say to them

7. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

oh uhhh. job description i guess? i mean dw casey is fine but everybodys kinda stressed :pensive:

8. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

technically wagon mound is a crossover! it doesnt really show yet though. umm i had some old wips back in the day that were percy jackson crossovers but GOD knows i never did anything with those. that being said... i am working on a little one right now 👀

9. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

i have not i would . like to keep it that way 👉👈

10. Do you write smut? if so what kind?

no

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

i have not but thats a poggers thing to do!!

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

:) well. my longest ever wip was a pjo story about werewolves and my beloved oc victoria and it was cowritten with one of my school friends (before she deleted the file 😔i love you j but what if i WANTED to revel in the bad choices involved in the writing of It's All Fun And Games Til Someone Gets Cursed)

13. What’s your all time favorite ship?

good ,,, quastion ???? i guess ill just say i am a multishipper idk :)

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

mm. i had thought out a weird sequel thingie for marsalias' A King in Chains series and it was fun (in a very sad meaning of the word.) but i dont think ill ever finish it / do anything with it

15. What are your writing strengths?

descriptions!! i love to describing an area or action :) its why i use so many commas and adjectives (ill be real i was designed for poetry not this Action nonsense.)

oh and the slightly-more-objective stuff like grammar and spelling!

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

ok ive been told otherwise but i feel like im bad at pacing. also action scenes, that kind of physical placement conveyed through words

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

well.! i think its very important to, whenever possible, write the dialogue in the actual language in which it's occurring (for the sake of like immersion) BUT i do not . trust myself to actually present another language correctly with just myself and google translate as tools

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

hmm ok probably percy jackson. if it was like........ disneys hercules or something im sorry to myself

19. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

rn its Bound by the Food Chain! :D this was an idea i really wanted to communicate

20. What fic are you most proud of?

same as the last hehe

---

if you see this and you write fanfiction i am tagging YOU!! and not just in an "anyone can do this ^^" way i am tagging YOU SPECIFICALLY, READER.

[gothamdetected-a]

an idiot’s guide to the wayne family.

now complete with new diagrams! i wish i wash kidding, ive really made a diagram to help illustrate this.

[ follow the link here for actual visible quality. thanks tumblr.]

some points to make quickly -

• this is not complete. there were probably more siblings and wives and children, but i just focused on the main lineage i could piece together from DC knowledge

• apologies for the lack of knowledge on the women in the family past the last century. this is unfortunately common in real life too, as women were not landowners etc, and without a marriage certificate they basically don’t show up on records. dc happily talk about the male line but not about the wives and daughters so :/

• the dates are fairly made up, and especially at the bottom are just me twisting things to fit my own personal canon

• and finally, i just wanted to say that while this is pieced together from what DC have told us, there are a lot of holes that i have filled with headcanons. not all of this is canon. sometimes i just want to give a person a cool life that dc are too cowardly to do.

so, although this varies by “earth”, i have tried to combine the various histories given for pre- and post-52 waynes into a full comprehensible timeline. i’ve probably failed, but this is what i’m sticking with.   

to start with we’re supposed to believe that there was a norse guy calling himself the Bat-Man, running around in the 10th century killing frost giants. is it plausible? yes. is it exaggerated? most definitely. am i wiping it from existence because it was one issue in a faintly terrible run that has technically been retconned anyway? absolutely. ignoring that makes the earliest recorded ancestor of the wayne family a man called gawayne de weyne, a french crusader in the 14th century. on some earths he’s called lancelot wayne (too on the nose) or harold wayne (thanks i hate it), so im personally going to retcon that and just say gawayne is it. also because i love the etymological aspect of the name beginning as de weyne in old high french and it slowly changing through out the centuries. gawayne, also sometimes written as gevain, was one of the knights sent to retrieve the holy grail, but, as knights tended to do, he died. sorry gawayne. the weirdest part about all of this is that he asked for his heart to be embalmed, and there’s a plot line revolving around this (batman: scottish connection). now i’m not saying that madness runs in the family, but the waynes absolutely do not get a good head start in history. 

gawayne must have had at least one surviving heir who goes on to have babies etc etc, and eventually we get to the 16th century, and the next instance of the waynes. specifically, contarf wayne. which, i have to say, super dumb name. if i ever have a kid, im calling it contarf. so it’s now the 1500s and the waynes have somehow become scottish, probably from getting given land after crusading and that. apparently gawayne was aknight of the scottish court, despite being french, which actually happened a lot back then. literally the only notable thing contarf does with his life is build castle wayne, and i swear these people are all born with both madness and a flair for the dramatic. yes at some point bruce does go to this gloomy scottish castle where it’s always rainy and stormy and fits right on in, so that’s terrifying.

around a hundred years later nathaniel wayne tries to emigrate across to the “new world”. nathaniel likes witchhunting, and has come over to what will one day be the US following a witch fleeing from england - annie. annie who he may have dated. annie who may be pregnant with his child. good on you nathaniel, that’s a healthy relationship you’ve got right there. after the baby is delivered, he finds her and. you know, people were not kind of witches back then, so she dies. and with her dying breath, curses nathaniel and all his descendants. which includes her OWN BABY (super punk move), and one day bruce wayne. this curse manifests in very few of the extant waynes surviving beyond 40, often going mad, and absolutely tuning on each other. nathaniel’s particular grisly end comes when his is the fateful colony that ends up in what-will-one-day-be-gotham (see my idiots guide to gotham for more juicy details), releasing the deacon blackfire from his little cave and ending up missing, presumed dead. (definitely dead). this is the start of the “waynes probably should avoid gotham” saga. spoiler alert - they don’t. 

somewhere in the interluding 100 years, a branch of the waynes do actually successfully make it over into the americas. 2 brothers, caleb and thomas simon wayne, reach the east coast from britain, and go their separate ways. caleb joins a convoy heading out west, leading a wagon train, and, as so many pioneers do, he also dies, while trying to make this trip. but caleb really isnt the interesting brother here (sorry man), because what thomas gets up to is far more exciting. he settles in, lo and behold, the newly formed town of gotham, and for some strange reason (probably because all the waynes are fairly nuts, as we’ve established at this point) decides to give devil-worshipping a go. maybe its fucking curse. maybe its something in the water. maybe its maybelline. but whatever it is, thomas wayne tries to summon and ensnare the demon barbatos by killing some innocents, in a wild, but understandable, attempt to gain immortality. he doesn’t succeed. or does he. it half works - instead of summoning the bat-demon (yes the same bat-demon that the founding fathers later summon and also trap beneath gotham) he gets one of darkseid’s hyper-dimensional bounty hunters, and some how, through some space age magic, the energy of this event corrupts him into agelessness/slowed ageing, we’re not totally sure. later dear old tom pops back up as the villainous dr simon hurt, and literally fights his own descendant. DC give no fucks. 

after the whole corrupting not-magic thing, but before he disappears, thomas/simon impregnates one of his cult’s disciples. a lot. (is this why the waynes can look 30 at 50? more on this at 10) and between 1747 and 1771 (because immortal people also have immortal sperm apparently), she bears him 3 sons. probably some daughters too but again, who cares about that. not DC, that’s for damn sure. these sons are all absolutely fucking insane, just like daddy dearest. the eldest, who is LITERALLY known as “mad” anthony wayne, is said to be the spitting image of bruce, which is confirmed through some time travelling bs that we’re not going to think about. anthony and horatio wayne, the middle brother, both sign up to fight in the revolutionary war. unfortunately THE CURSE STRIKES AGAIN and horatio perishes while burning british ships. anthony goes on to becomes a brigadier general, serving directly under george washington and pulls some crazy good strategies that help to kick the british out of new jersey, earning his nickname of “mad” anthony, because only someone fucking nuts could come up with these plans, and pull them off. the youngest brother darius wayne is only 4 when the war breaks out, and is therefore too Babey to fight, but does later become notable for being the man to start construction on wayne manor. in 1795, using the money inherited from his brother horatio on his death, he hires an architect nathan van derm, to begin planning and building. sadly darius will never see it completed, with funds dwindling and his older brother’s death, eventually darius takes his own life. 

not to worry, he leaves behind 2 sons - herkimer and charles wayne. literally herkimer’s only notable feature is that he fights in the war of 1812. sorry my guy, DC hate you. charles, on the other hand, is a businessman, who manages the failing company his father had left behind and starts to grow the wayne fortune. charles buys more land surrounding the manor, as well as a lot of general gotham real estate, and is the man accrediting for starting wayne enterprises as a series of several small business, ranging from merchant trading to land ownership to mining, in 1845. however charlie contracts tuberculosis at the ripe old age of 62 and shuffles off the mortal coil. 

the oldest of his sons, charles lincoln wayne, also known as charles junior, does 2 things - begins construction on the wayne manor again in 1855 after purchasing it back from jerome k. van derm, the destitute son of the original architect, who had been living in the bones of the construcion, and uses a considerable portion of his inheritance to build the gotham botanical gardens in 1870. the next son, winslow wayne, is another enigma - the only thing mentioned about him in the comics is that he fought alongside teddy roosevelt, which i’m guessing is in the spanish-american war. but the youngest two brothers, joshua thomas and solomon zebadiah wayne are the real spicy pair. not only do they tackle the bat infestation on the manor grounds, but the pair work to change the federal system of america - joshua, when he’s not managing the wayne companies, is an abolitionist who engages in secret missions to free slaves by getting them across the border into canada, and solomon, the vaguely more sensible of the two, becomes a judge, attempting to be as fair and incorruptible as possible. sadly joshua is killed due to his slave smuggling antics (THE CURRSSEE), and this sends solomon slightly nuts, and causes him to contract the architect cyrus pinkney, who is even more nuts, to basically. build gotham. these two men are the reason 97% of buildings have gargoyles on them. 

solomon has only 1 child before he dies, who fortunately, grows up to be a very shrewd businessman capable of growing wayne ent even through with the advent of shipping and rail sectors. this man, alan wayne, constructs the original wayne tower in 1888, and it completely swamps the gotham skyline. he also marries catherine van derm, the great granddaughter of the original architect of wayne manor, and finally manage to complete and move in to the building in 1895, exactly 100 years after the project was started. for a while they are very happy, and catherine falls pregnant. but this darn curse just won’t leave these wayne boys alone, and in 1897, catherine dies giving birth to their son, kenneth wayne. a year later, lost and traumatised and going insane thinking about his wife’s death alan wayne mysteriously disappears (read as: fell down a well and was maybe or maybe not tortured and killed by the court of owls). 

kenneth wayne, raised as virtually an orphan, turns out to have his papa’s business management skills, and, foreseeing america's impending industrialisation in the 20s and 30s, makes some risky moves that pay off, including the advent of wayne chemicals, and wayne ent expands yet again. kenneth, like the recurring pattern that you can see here, dies fairly early due to WW2 however, leaving his wife laura to care for their 4 sons AND the company, which she does like a boss ass bitch. seriously, women barely had the vote and she was already a titan of industry and raising 4 teenage boys like. massive props to you babe. these boys are

ishmael wayne, a whaler who is an incredible parody of captain ahab and also dies trying to catch a white whale, elwood wayne, who goes and reclaims what is now called waynemoor castle in scotland, living there until his death, silas wayne, who may or may not be a thief posing as a wayne because the real silas died, AND at long last, patrick wayne - bruce’s granpappy, who founded the wayne tech arm of the company at 20 years old, aiding the war effort, and where this stupidly long post ends, because there is 0 point in me recounting the lives of thomas, bruce, or any of his children. everyone knows them. could i write more about thomas’ siblings and the kanes and how they tie in? yes. but this post is like 2100 words long and i want to sleep at some point today so this will have to do askjdbjsdhgf

[team-free-will-oneshots]

Goosebumps

Title: Goosebumps Request/Prompt: Hi I was wondering if I could make a request. Your writing is really good and i was wondering if i could request some jack kline x male!reader content. Either imagines or just a cute romantic fic, im not to picky. I haven't found much writing for male reader pairings and you seemed like someone who could pull it off. Love the writing, can't wait to read more. Gavin- @trans-in-a-bucket2  Summary: It’s cold - good thing you have a certain Nephilim to help warm you up. Pairing: Jack Kline x Male!Reader Warnings: fluff fluff fluff fluff fluff oh and more fluff. all fluff. the fluffiest. so much fluff. Word Count: 1,576

note; ok sooo i know it’s probably not cold wherever y’all are from but here in australia it’s getting into winter and this is what it gave me inspiration for soooo sorry ?? also ive never written a specifically male reader before so i hope this is okay !

It was cold.

As the sun dipped below the horizon, so did the temperature, leaving you with cold fingers and feet that grew numb as the fall frost crept under the doors. The bunker’s heating system was down, and though Dean promised to take a look in the morning, his words offered you little comfort now. It was nearly midnight, and you’d yet to be graced with a second of sleep.

You sat in your room, bundled in your duvet with a steaming cup of tea in your hands as you tried to soothe your racing mind and coax warmth back into your body. The mug was too warm on your hands, or perhaps your fingers were too cold, and you had to balance it precariously in your lap to ease the burning sting it left on your palms. You huffed an annoyed sigh and could’ve sworn your breath misted.

God, what you wouldn’t give for some human warmth right now. But your boyfriend, Jack, was on a hunt with Sam, and you doubted he’d return for another few days…

Your thoughts were interrupted by the soft knocking on your door - a light brush of knuckles against wood, almost tentative in its quietness. You’d recognise that knock anywhere. But… how? He wasn’t due back for at least another day…

“Come in?” Your voice tilted questioningly, and you were careful to keep the hope out of your tone. The last thing you needed was Dean teasing you - it seemed like his favourite thing to do was affectionately tease you about how head-over-heels you were with your boyfriend, and he with you. Ever since you’d joined Sam and Dean, they’d accepted you as a brother, but along with that sense of home and acceptance came brotherly teasing, as well. It didn’t bother you - you knew they’d stop if you asked them to, and it was nice to be considered part of the family... but that didn’t mean it didn’t get on your nerves every now and again.

Your muddled thoughts were cleared, however, when the door creaked open to reveal the shining face of Jack himself. His mouth stretched into a grin as he saw you, and his smile never failed to give you butterflies.

“Y/N,” he said, your name falling from his lips like a prayer. You jumped up eagerly in your haste to reach him, but you were interrupted as you spilt hot tea on your shirt. You cursed, swiping futilely at the material for a moment before huffing and ignoring it - at least it was warm, for now. Jack’s face twisted in concern as he approached.

“Are- are you alright? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you-” he began to apologise, but you were quick to dismiss his worries.

“I’m fine, I’m fine, just too eager to see you, I guess,” you said, another smile curving your lips. It proved contagious as Jack returned it, and you wasted no time in stepping close to him, grabbing the collar of his jacket and pulling him close as you kissed him.

He hummed pleasantly into the kiss, pressing closer to you and wrapping his arms around you as he did so. Your hands slipped under his jacket, cocooning themselves in the warmth between his shirt and his outerwear, and you half moaned in relief at the reprieve from the cold. Drawing back from the kiss, you nestled your nose in the crook of his neck. Jack frowned at how icy your skin was, beginning to run his hands up and down your arms in an attempt to warm you.

“Y/N, you’re freezing!” he exclaimed, and you nodded.

“Yeah… oh, I guess you don’t get cold, do you?” you asked, and he shook his head.

“No, one of the perks of being a Nephilim, I guess,” he replied, smiling again as he pulled away. He frowned again as he saw the damp stain on your shirt from the tea. “Won’t that get cold?” he fretted.

You shrugged. “Yeah, I’ll grab another shirt in a se-”

But Jack was already two steps ahead of you, opening your shared closet and tossing you a fresh shirt. You weren’t sure whether it was his or yours, but it didn’t really matter - the two of you shared most of your clothing, anyway.

You changed, racing the bite of the cold air on your skin as you did so. The moment you were dressed again Jack’s arms were back around you, warming you with his body heat as he guided you to the bed. The two of you crawled in and you cuddled in close to your boyfriend as he drew up the blankets. Your cold feet found his legs, pressing against them for warmth, and bless him, the Nephilim didn’t complain for a moment.

“Now, don’t get me wrong, but… why are you home? I thought the hunt would take a few more days, at least?” you said. The lights were off, cloaking the two of you in the safety and solace of the darkness as you snuggled into each other.

“I wanted to surprise you,” he said quietly. “When we arrived two hunters had already picked up the case - we offered to stay and help, but one of them had lost their family to the witch, so we left them with our number if they needed any help and came back home,” he explained, and you nodded.

“Oh. I hope they get her,” you said, and Jack nodded.

“I think they will,” he replied softly. “Your turn - why are you awake?” he asked, and you laughed, the sound swallowed up by the darkness.

“I was cold,” you informed him. “Apparently I’m too used to having you to warm me up,” you teased, kissing his cheek. You could’ve sworn he blushed, but the darkness shrouded his face too well to be sure.

“Well, I have an idea,” he told you, voice bright and curious. You nodded for him to continue, and suddenly you felt something warm and soft wrapping around you like a second skin. It was hard to see in the dark, but you could just make out the shape…

“Jack… are these your wings?” you asked in awe, and he nodded shyly.

“Yeah… I thought, if they can protect someone from supernatural forces, maybe they could help with the cold, too. Am I… wrong?” You were quick to ease the concern in his voice.

“No, you’re very right,” you told him, sighing contentedly as his wings seemed to draw the cold from your skin, replacing it with a tingling warmth - or maybe that just came from being so close to Jack in the first place. At any rate, you felt fully sheltered from the cold air as he acted as your own personal heater.

Jack ran his fingers absentmindedly down your spine, observing you with a gentle smile sloping his lips. “Well, then I’m very glad I came home early so I could help,” he said earnestly. The corners of your lips twitched upwards.

“Me too… but I could deal with any cold, so long as you were with me,” you told him, and his smile widened, his eyes softening as he observed your relaxed expression, feeling so clearly safe in his presence.

“I love you, Y/N,” he said, his voice barely rising above a whisper. The words sent a wave of warmth flooding through you, heating your veins and raising goosebumps over your skin. You’d never said those words to each other before - you’d thought them many times, imagined how they’d sound rolling off his tongue, but nothing in your imagination could have compared to the reality. He swallowed nervously, and you realised with a twinge of guilt that you were leaving him hanging.

“I love you, too,” you told him, and he breathed a sigh of relief before surging in to kiss you. You smiled into his lips, moving closer as Jack’s wings tightened around you and his hands found your cheeks, before running down your arms as his mouth moved on yours - he’d been uncertain the first few times you’d kissed, but his trembling lips and nervous hands seemed a distant memory as he confidently deepened the exchange, his tongue teasing yours as his hands sought your skin. He frowned, breaking off the kiss and pulling away as his fingers skimmed your flesh, still raised with gooseflesh.

“I thought you were warm now,” he said in confusion, and you chuckled.

“I am… you just give me goosebumps,” you told him, voice taking a teasing edge. “It’s a good thing. A very good thing,” you told him when he still looked concerned, moving in to press a soft kiss to his jaw. He relaxed, his mouth seeking yours once more.

“Good,” he murmured into the kiss. You hummed in reply as you nestled in closer to him, drawing away from the kiss. He pressed his lips to your temple. “Are you tired?”

You nodded, surprised to realise how true it was - now that you were toasty warm and cuddled up with your boyfriend, tiredness was slowly washing over you, the gentle tendrils of sleep pulling you gently into the darkness.

“Sleep, Y/N,” Jack urged, murmuring his soft words into the skin of your forehead. “Dream of pleasant things. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

And so, protected in his embrace, you curled in closer and let the peaceful darkness sweep you away.

[lokishornns]

Make a Wish [3]

—

masterlist

—

— send requests!!

pairing: loki x reader (fem)

type: series, some humor?

rating: pg13

word count: 2,774

warnings: cursing most likely. mentions of nyc attack and deaths. mention of trafficking if you squint.

summary:  You’re a new employee for the Make a Wish foundation, struggling to make a living in the ever expensive New York City. When your boss - who, for the record, hates your guts - assigns an impossible task as a way to get you fired, you do everything in your power to make a kid happy. Even if that does include getting face to face with the most hated man in the city.

notes: im so so so sorry this took so long, but summer started so i should be pumping out fics soon. also,,,,, this is the worst thing ive ever written

taglist is open!! (check bio)

—

“Do you have a way to get home?” his voice cuts through the storm swiftly, causing a shiver to tread down your back. You turn to the villain, watching as he peers out of his front doors to where you stand. Is he actually concerned?

You realize he may be right questioning if you have a ride or not. You check your phone, staring at the time. The train back to your side of town would probably not be at the station for another half hour, and you weren’t too keen on sitting in a subway at the devil’s hour. You shrug, looking back to the downpour.

“If the subway counts, yes,” you say, mentally preparing yourself of having to traverse in the downpour once again. Loki’s mouth drops into a frown and you swear for a second you see a look of worry being directed your way before you blink it away. Loki’s face looks to be contemplating something as he skims your figure with his eyes.

Oh my god, this man needs to stop looking at me like that, you think, your face feeling hot all of a sudden.

“Is anyone able to pick you up?” Loki asks, and you’re stunned into silence for a split second, shocked that he’s actually looking out for your wellbeing. You shake yourself from those thoughts, instead, shooting a glance to your phone before shaking your head.

“My roommate doesn’t have a car,” you respond, the awkwardness of the conversation seeping into your skin, your nerves standing on end. You watch as Loki’s face contorts into a look of frustration before waving at you to follow him back inside. You don’t move.

“Come on, love; you’re going to get hypothermia out there,” Loki grumbles, his eyes rolling. You only stare at the villain, watching cautiously at his next actions.

He could kill me. Or sell me. Maybe he wants to enslave me.

“I swear that no harm will be done to you, now please come inside. You’re messing up my doormat.” Loki raises his hands up, palms facing outwards as if to show you that he’s not holding anything that can do any harm. You glance him over again warily before taking a small step back inside the enormous house. How does someone even get a house this big in New York?

The chill inside of the house does little to soothe your shiver and your skin seems to ripple at the feeling of his eyes over you. He turns away abruptly, walking quickly to a hallway, forcing you to jog to catch up to his long legs. The darkness creeps over your legs and up your spine as you disappear into the hallway, your only savior being the occasional moonlight that pierces through the windows, warped and distorted by water droplets.

Loki pushes open a door, the black wood gliding silently across the marble floors. He rummages around in a dimly lit room before peeking around the doorframe to peer at you.

“These should fit,” Loki says, his arm outstretched, offering you what seems to be a folded pair of sweats. You only stare at his hand before he sighs, rolling his eyes. “Killed by sweatpants, what a dramatic way to go.” You grumble lightly before taking the clothing from his hands. “Bathroom’s right there. Once you’ve changed, walk down this hallway. You’ll see the garage.” Loki’s tone gives you the obvious sign that whatever he says is final before he whips back around, stalking down the hallway.

You peer after the man for a moment, watching his features blend and contrast the darkness surrounding him.

Nice ass.

You sigh as you pull on the sweats, the fabric being surprisingly warm and soft. They’re quite a bit larger than your frame, and you have the slight suspicion that these might belong to Loki, but you don’t really care. You inhale deeply, catching a whiff of something rather desirable before looking at yourself in the mirror. You almost scream at the sight. The makeup you’d put on at the beginning of your day was running down your cheeks, your nose bright red. Your hair is in wet columns, almost plastered to your head. To cut things short, you look like a wet dog.

You can’t seem to muster up the capability to care about your appearance, instead just using a spare towel to run through your hair. The least you could do for Loki was give these sweats back after you’re done using them. Maybe; he’s still a villain.

You pull the bathroom door open, surprised to find the hallways being lit with warm lighting, an orange glow cast on the marble floor. You almost feel comfort at the change.

Your eyes bulge out of their sockets at the sight of the garage; cars are lined up, all sleek and polished and black. The variety of luxury cars oozes wealth and a small feeling of envy aches in your stomach as you scan through the vehicles.

“Liking the view?” a voice asks from behind you, and you yelp, turning on your heels to face whoever decided it would be a good idea to sneak up on you. Loki’s amused grin meets your eyes and you practically sigh in relief.

I need to stop feeling so comfortable around him; he’s literally the worst person in New York right now, you think. But, he’s been good to me so far.

“So, take your pick,” Loki says, and your eyes widen, looking back to the vast array of cars.

“You must have a very miserable life,” you mumble, half hoping Loki can hear you. If he does, he doesn’t make any snarky comment in response. You walk cautiously through the cars, refraining from reaching out and touching the shiny and gorgeous vehicles. One near the end of the line catches your eye and your brows furrow. “You have a third-generation impala,” you say dumbly.

“Yes; is that a surprise?” Loki asks, cocking an eyebrow of his own up. You turn back to the car, shaking your head softly.

“I guess not. Just doesn’t seem your style.” You shrug.

“How do you know the model?” Loki’s voice holds curiosity and your lips pick up into a slight smile, no animosity or harshness directed in your gaze to Loki. He wants to shiver at the sight.

“My dad used to have one, just like this, except it was an ugly blue. It was a pretty car, but a beast to work on. There’s not a lot of black ones around.” Loki senses a small bit of sensitivity in your tone and studies you, watching and picking apart your movements carefully as you walk around the car. You let out a low whistle. “Not a single scratch or dent. I’m impressed; she’s gorgeous. Can we do this one?” you ask, and the hope that sparks in your eyes gives Loki an odd feeling. He rolls his eyes.

“Your wish is my command, princess,” he mocks, and you stick out a tongue. If he was going to act childish, then so were you.

Loki and you sat in comfortable silence, music playing softly in the background to alleviate tension. Your window was rolled down, your hands curling around the wind and rain as Loki blew past streets, the impala screeching and grumbling with life.

“Why are you not like a villain?” you question absentmindedly, not even realizing the words had slipped from your mouth until the damage is done. Loki gives you a side glance, probably confused on what you meant. You go to open your mouth again before Loki cuts you off.

“What do you define as a villain, fierce one?” Loki asks, and you pause. Your eyes sweep over the curve of Loki’s nose and facial structure, thinking about the question.

He seemed to have a point with the question. Your classic definition of a villain is the one you see in every new blockbuster playing on the big screen. A creepy person, usually rich, but with little to no morals and respect for others. Someone who’s constantly creating chaos and a trail of destruction. But as you glance in the side-view mirror, you only see headlights staring back at you, no trail of destruction in sight.

“Someone who takes advantage of others for their own personal intentions on a large scale. Someone who does the opposite of good.”

“And what do you define as good?” Loki’s voice is smooth and calm, knowing he has you ensnared in a trap of thorns, snagging on your being. Your aura flickers.

“Honesty, patience, selflessness. Lawful,” you murmur, watching as Loki’s eyes flicker with a brighter shade of green, something swirling in his irises. His hand on the wheel grips the black steering wheel a little tighter.

“If you define a villain as one who takes advantage of others in a selfish manner, you’re describing all individuals who live on your pathetic planet. If you describe good as being lawful, then being a villain and being good is not mutually exclusive,” Loki mentions, and your mouth falls open, your throat drying up. “Do you know what I did to earn my position as New York’s most feared man?”

The question makes you hesitate, your mind swirling as you try to remember. You remember the invasion and the panic that shot through your nerves whenever you felt the ground tremble and moan beneath your feet. You can recall the smoke and dust that had filtered into your lungs, making you cough and gag.

“The invasion,” you whisper. The wince on Loki’s face as the words filter from your mouth makes you frown. “It killed seventy-four people.”

“Do you know why I did such a thing?” You only look at the god. His jaw is clenched tighter than it was a few moments ago, his knuckles whiter than before. “Do you know what my selfish intentions were?” Loki turns his head, his icy eyes bleeding into your soul. Your stomach lurches.

“No,” you mumble, a mix of fear and intrigue gripping your heart. Your voice is barely louder than the rumble of the car, but Loki hears it.

“Well, it would serve you best to figure that out,” Loki says with a sense of finality. You hadn’t even noticed the car had stopped outside of your apartment building, rain drizzling down the windows. You clear your throat, gathering your belongings in your arms.

“Thank you; for the ride and the clothes,” you say, giving the villain a smile as you stumble from the vehicle, the door still propped open. A small one, but genuine. Loki returns the gesture with an amused smirk of his own.

“Anything for a fan,” Loki teases, his eyes dancing with amusement. You scoff, slamming the door behind you. You stalk towards the apartment, ignoring the sound of the Impala screeching off into the night of New York City, the streetlamps flickering. The time on your phone makes you groan, reflecting the night you had endured.

The key jiggles in the lock, your door creaking as you push it open. The stuffy smell of candles burn your nostrils and you cough, the smell reaching the back of your throat. You wave your hand in front of your nose, swatting away the overbearing scent.

“B?” you call out, blowing out candles as you walk through the apartment. Your roommate makes no move to respond, prompting you to peer into her room. You sigh, B asleep and draped over her bed, snoring softly as papers surround her. You figured B had a rough night at her nursing residency based on the empty wine glass sitting on her bedside. You tread through her piles of clothes that are scattered throughout the room, blowing out candles and flicking off a few lamps. You grab a blanket and drape it over her sleeping form.

You throw your phone onto your bed, following it soon after. You couldn’t call in sick to work, your boss would assume you had failed and try to figure out any way to get rid of you. You grumble at the thought of having to wake up in a few short hours just to stumble into your boss’ evil lair and be ridiculed.

Your hope of drifting off into a short yet peaceful slumber is interrupted by thoughts of the one thing – or person – you shouldn’t be thinking about. Loki’s words ring throughout your body, thrumming with something you couldn’t decipher yet. Although you had just met and mingled with the most dangerous person in New York City, you felt oddly successful. You had managed to contact Danny’s wish and had somehow convinced him to actually meet Danny, even if minimal plans were made. Although, you had gotten the video out of it.

Your thoughts were ripped back to the file back at the Avenger’s tower. It had all of Loki’s information, transcripts of interviews and interrogations, a mugshot that was far too attractive, and his address. The Avengers has his address. Your stomach churned. You had always believed that the Avengers and Loki were playing a game of tiptoe, just waiting for Loki to strike at the Avengers or vice versa. News stations and the media portrayed Loki as the most dangerous man in New York City, so why did the Avengers allow him to live smack dab in the middle of it with a luxurious mansion that didn’t necessarily scream “hey, a terrifying villain lives here!”? It wasn’t like the Avengers were incapable of taking down Loki.

Thoughts of the Avengers and Loki were still swirling in your head as you stumbled into your boss’ office, entangled with worries and stress about Danny. You plaster on a tight smile for your boss, Greg, as he swivels around in his too-creaky rolling chair. You cringe at the sight of his office for a moment, a smell that oddly resembled rotten Chinese takeout making your eyes water. Papers are stacked everywhere. For a charity organization, you’d think that they’d have higher standards for places of work - or employees at that matter.

“Ah,” Greg’s eyes light up in recognition or annoyance, you can’t really tell. “New employee, finally gave up on that one project?” A more genuine smile of satisfaction pulls on the corner of your lips.

“No, I actually happened to get in contact with Loki last night,” you say, watching as your boss’ eyebrows draw together in confusion.

“That’s impossible. You’re lying,” Greg sneers, a pepper flake becoming apparent on his front tooth. You dig your phone out, unlocking the device to pull up a video.

“I thought you may say that,” you hum, handing him your phone. Your smile grows wider as he plays the video, his eyes widening.

“Why do I have to do this?” Loki’s disgusted voice sounds through the speaker.

“Because, I need proof,” you hissed, knowing at that moment, Loki had rolled his eyes to the camera.

“That’s stupid.”

“Put yourself in my shoes-”

“Tragic.”

“-If you walked into my work and said that you had met the most feared person in New York City, would people believe you?”

“No, I’m the god of lies.”

“Ugh, whatever, just say it,” you grumbled.

“Fine, you really are a stubborn one, aren’t you? Anyways, evening Greg, I am here with your annoying employee to confirm that I will be working with her for the duration of this Wish. There, am I done?”

Greg’s face falls, his eyes wide and jaw slack. A hint of pink dusts your cheeks at the embarrassment of watching you and the most dangerous person in New York City interact with each other, but a smile covers it up. His eyes flick from you to the phone that’s being held with an iron grip. You almost missed the tremble in his hand.

“This is fake.” You hear the hesitation in Greg’s voice, hinting that he doesn’t entirely believe himself.

“No, it’s not. If you would like to call him, I can just grab his number right now-”

“No, no! That won’t be necessary,” Greg yelps, panic alight in his eyes. He practically tosses your phone back to you, nervous laughter bubbling past his lips. For the slightest moment, you think Loki may have found this rather funny.

What the fuck? I need to stop acting like I’m buddies with Loki, dear god.

“That’s all, go do,” Greg trails off, seemingly stumped on what to tell you to do next. You hum a quick thanks before you’re out of the door, slipping your phone away as you make your way to the subway.

  —

permanent // @wewon-mrstark @timesarehardformarvellovers

loki //  @quenilla @darkprincessloki92 @jessiejunebug @agentcoulsonlivesinallofus @lokixme @themusingsofmany @iamverity @smhavengers

make a wish //  @freakygirlforeve7-blog-blog  @neaswift @sm0kingcrack @megasimpleplan4ever @barikawhobarikawho @padmeisgay @wolfsmom1 @themusingsofmany @iamverity @smhavengers

[shulto-masusdesus]

The Cryptid Machine [BNHA AU: Chapter 1]

Time for the cryptid machine to go wild

(this is my writing sideblog btw)

i havent written anything else in days. i pushed for it so hard. 7k in three days and its just one chapter lol, fuck (i mean i wasnt writing anything else anyway so im glad i was productive at least thanks for giving me something to do lol)

But it was also fun

I accidentally really made them into the scooby-doo gang and honestly its the best thing ive ever done unintentionally. They just fit so well

@kawaiipotatuh @vango-bango and @sooske yo hi yall said you wanted to read it so i wrote it

sorry sooske i didnt get to shiga in this chapter but hes comin,,,,this is gonna be chaptered so he’ll definitely be in this soon. definitely plot relevant because i love shiggy. 

anyway A/N over time for the story

Rating: T for language and fantasy violence (no nsfw this time this is group friend story)

tags in the tags. some body horror because cryptid-related creepiness yknow. and major character death later on so yknow

if i missed anything tell me, okay now time for the story <3

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Izuku, frankly, was stunned.

“I thought it was just a hobby!”

“A hobby?” Shouto threw back what looked to be his thirtieth Five-Hour Energy, pouring syrup on the pancakes Izuku brought without paying much attention. They were more syrup than pancake at this point, but that was hardly priority at the moment. “A hobby?”

The giant frog sitting on the table between them blinked its left eye, and then the right, after a little delay. Izuku shuddered. Too much frog, too close, too much detail. Very scaly and slimy and bumpy. Frogs were not supposed to be big. But it was easily bigger than his head, almost the size of his torso.

“How did you get it in here?”

“Thawed crickets.” Shouto raised an eyebrow, as if having frozen crickets stored for a time such as this was normal and expected. Like a madman consumed by his own craft, he picked up a syrup-coated pancake with his own two hands, and bit into it. Then he looked at the mess with mild surprise, a gaze that read “What the fuck is this? Where did all this syrup come from?” Izuku didn’t have the heart to answer him. “…You’re underestimating me.”

Izuku shut his eyes, sucked in a breath, rubbing his temples. “So. You found this frog in the woods behind your house. You just so happened to have a pack of frozen crickets-”

“No, that’s not what happened,” Shouto leaned forward, elbows on the table, the plate of pancakes Izuku brought ruined and pushed to the side, with that damned cursed light in his eyes he got when he was about to tell a story, dive head-first into a theory, or conjure up a new way to ditch work. “I’ve been hunting this frog for months. I learn about many creatures when researching,”

Scrolling r/cryptids, Izuku thought. And various other unspeakable 2chan threads and dark web sites. He sighed. Those pancakes were better than usual, too...he managed to remember to use less butter…he forgot that all the time…if he was going to make pancakes in the middle of the night, they may as well be good...what was Shouto talking about? Oh yeah, the frog.

“-and I encountered this post about a kappa sighting. It was confusing, and I almost wrote it off as another incident of someone just seeing something very mundane in the wrong light - until I recognized the location of the sighting.” There it was, Shouto’s rare grin, a look very reminiscent of the cat that finally caught the mouse. “…Heartstone Lake, on the park side of the woods.”

The giant frog grumbled. Loudly. Its chest puffed a little and Izuku felt a wild fear for what a real croak would sound like. This thing was huge. “Uhm, yeah? And?”

“So I went and checked it out.” He went over to his Wall, pointing to photo after photo, and Izuku hummed along, suddenly very, very worried about this frog in the Todoroki’s basement. This could end in many ways, and a very loud croak waking up his dad would be one of the worse ones. “Found tracks. Tracks, Izuku. You have to understand - nobody ever finds tracks.”

Izuku nodded. “Crazy.” He said, noticing how the frog’s eye was starting to slowly roll around, as if looking, scanning its surroundings. He was a little bit more than freaked out. He really had thought that this was just an interest of Shouto’s. Not something he was actually going to pursue, and that it produced a very crypid-like thing, a real result? A part of him wanted to go home and go back to bed, before Shouto decided to find a demon from hell or something. Or before the frog turned out to be a demon from hell. “…Did you do a steak-out?”

“Yes. Many steak-outs.” Shouto sighed, rubbing his face. “For…six weeks. Every night and every spare minute I could get. Along with a camera live feed setup. Only today did I actually see something, and once I did, I didn’t let it get away.” His smile was so wholesome, but the fruit of his labor was probably a harbinger of the void. Izuku was torn between supporting his friend and self-preservation.

Izuku decided to call the two people who would help back him up in whatever answer was the right one. The guardian angels, Tenya and Ochako. Because he needed help.

“I’m gonna call Tenya and Ochako.”

To Izuku’s bewilderment, Shouto deflated, smile dying, abruptly concerned. Izuku sputtered, pausing in pulling his phone out of his pocket. “What?! Do you not want them to know, or-?!”

With a sigh, Shouto grumbled, “Tenya…You know what he’d say.”

Izuku rolled his eyes. “It’s probably what you need to hear, really. Monster or not, this frog doesn’t belong indoors. We could get money for it, and what if it’s a new species or something-”

The other boy sighed. “Fine, whatever-”

The underside of the frog’s throat started expanding. Izuku watched in mute horror as it opened its mouth, and released a croak.

It was louder than Izuku expected. Very much so. His ears were left ringing from the rumbling warble, but that was hardly the biggest problem. There was a lot of thudding and yelling going on upstairs, in the upper levels of the Todoroki household; the family converging in on Shouto’s basement for whatever that definitely inhumane noise was.

Shouto’s dad was the strictest father around, and didn’t allow Shouto to have friends over on weeknights, nevermind late at night; since Izuku, an unapproved friend, basically snuck into the house on a weeknight at the unholy hour of three in the morning, he was breaking many, many rules.

And a giant fucking frog on the table in the middle of the room also would do more than raise a few eyebrows.

Shouto, however, was prepared. He pushed a mysterious white jar across the table to him, and pointed to the basement awning window. “I’ll help,” He said. “It’s actually not all that heavy.”

“Shouto! What was that?! What are you doing in there, it’s three in the morning on a school night-!”

There was his father. However, aside from the actual basement door lock, Shouto secretly installed about six extra locks, so he wasn’t getting in any time soon. “Studying, Dad,” Shouto said, heaving the massive, slimy frog off the table. He nailed he tired, annoyed, exasperated tone perfectly. Izuku opened the jar, and forced down a squeak - mushy, wet, dead crickets. “There’s a science tomorrow, I want to make sure I’m ready.”

His dad went quiet, which was his “you’re probably lying, but finding out the truth is more effort than I’m willing to put in at the moment” response. Izuku’s been witness to it a lot, as this is far from the first time he’s been a Master Lock away from getting caught. Shouto gave Izuku a look, frog in hand, as he opened the small window.

“Studying at such an…early hour is counter-productive. Get to bed, Shouto.”

“Alright.” Izuku shimmied out the window, onto the grass outside, and cringed as he opened the jar and gently picked up a soggy cricket corpse. With some difficulty, Shouto shoved the fat mass of jiggling skin through the awning, and Izuku pulled it the rest of the way out.

“Don’t let it out of your sight,” Shouto mouthed, scowling a little. Most likely because he was forced to get rid of his first find. Weird giant frog or not, it was really important to Shouto, so he couldn’t lose track of it-

The frog grumbled, and started hopping off.

“Get it!” Shouto hissed, and Izuku ran after it.

It wasn’t as fast as he thought. He caught up to it easily, and offered it a few crickets to bribe it into sitting still for a moment. Shouto’s window shut, and tense yelling ensued; Shouto buying time so he could hide incriminating evidence. His dad probably heard them.

An awkward ten minutes passed. Routinely, Izuku dropped a cricket or two, and the frog stayed put. Eventually, Shouto opened the window again, glaring.

“Take it to your house,” He said. “God knows I’m not gonna get away with hiding it here.” And he shut the window.

“So,” Izuku said, to the monster frog, dropping a couple more crickets. Its tongue flicked out to grab them, and honestly, Izuku feared for his safety. “I guess you’re coming to my place?”

 _______________________________________________________________

 Step one; get it onto his bike.

His basket was definitely big enough for the frog. He could probably stop every couple minutes to feed it a cricket so it wouldn’t struggle too much while he was on the road. It wouldn’t end well for either of them if it decided to upset the balance of the bike on the road.

He lugged the frog into the basket - it really wasn’t as heavy as it looked - and gave it a few crickets before locking the lid. Step two; get it home. That was the easy part.

The ride was mostly uneventful. The route was mostly muscle memory, so it wasn’t hard to hyperfocus on every odd rustle and bump on the back of his bike. He stopped to feed it about five times, and each time its tongue lashed out harder and faster. His fight-or-flight instinct begged him to run away from the very real monster frog on the back of his bike. He channeled the energy into maintaining cadence. If Shouto wasn’t his best friend, and wouldn’t probably murder him if he lost it, he would’ve let the frog hop into the woods when it tried to.

Finally, he reached his plain suburban neighborhood. He considered stopping at Kacchan’s house, but he’d probably kill the frog on sight, so he couldn’t rely on him for moral support. Time to call Ochako up for an early-morning napover. She said “anytime”, right?

Step three; get it to his room. His backyard didn’t have a fence, and he didn’t have a basement, and even if his mom didn’t have a panic attack when she saw the frog, she would definitely tell him to get it out of the house. Any rational person would, really. So. Hiding it in his bedroom was the only choice.

Mom never got out of bed past midnight, so it was easy to trudge inside, to his room, and to lock the door behind him. Then the frog leapt from his arms, and hopped its slimy body onto his bed. Ew. Time to call Ochako.

As promised, she answered by the fourth ring. “…Yaeah…Deku…?”

“Uhm, come to my house?” Izuku chuckled nervously. “Shouto found…uh, a giant frog, but he couldn’t keep it at his house, so I’m keeping it at mine. I need a little moral support?”

“...” Ochako sighed, a very, very long sigh. “...”

“Ochako?”

“What?”

“Shouto found a giant frog-”

“A WHAT?!”

It took Ochako all of fifteen minutes to get to his place, on foot. She took the short route to his room - through his window - and gawked at the frog for another five minutes, school backpack and sleeping bag falling from her hands.

“He - really?!”

“Yeah…”

She stared at it for a long, long time. It grumbled again. Izuku felt a sinking feeling.

“It’s - a giant frog.”

“...Yeah.”

“And…he just…?”

“No, he said he’d been looking for it for the past six weeks.”

“So that’s why he’s been passing out in class?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

Ochako stared at the frog. “I thought it was all…”

“He flipped out a little when I said I thought it was just a hobby.” He ran his fingers through his hair with a huff. “This is really important to him.”

“Well…” She mumbled, eyes wide. “We may as well…take good care of it. H…how do you get a frog to go to sleep? Don’t frogs need heat lamps? How do we take care of a frog - a giant frog-” She stomped her foot. “Did Shouto think about this at all?”

She looked at Izuku. He raised an eyebrow in return. And she fell into giggles. “Yeah,” She said. “Let’s get it in front of a heater?”

Izuku left the room, running down to the hall closet to get a heater; on his way back, Ochako suddenly screamed.

He ran to his room, and to his horror, the frog was, for lack of a better term, erupting. Blowing up like a balloon. Ochako shoved him out of the doorway, into the hall, and slammed the door shut.

“What is going on here?” Oh, his mom was up now, rushing down the hall with concern. “What happened? Ochako, very…nice to see you, but at this hour? What’s happening?”

The two teens were speechless. They looked to each other for answers, but found nothing there but shock and general horror. Tentatively, Ochako cracked the door back open.

The frog was splayed about thinly like a shed bag. Sitting on Izuku’s bed now, instead, was a girl with long green hair. And also very naked, the frog broke open and was now a naked girl-

Confusion ensued. Mom screamed a little, shocked by the frog flash bag, and Ochako and Deku screamed because the frog was gone and Shouto was now on the list of people who wanted them dead; then his mom ran in, bringing the blanket up around the girl with shaking hands and firing off questions one after another, and Izuku screamed louder because he realized that somehow the frog became the girl - Ochako screamed louder, because she realized that with Shouto’s internet skill and wide range of information sources, there was no way to hide from him.

“Izuku, who is this?! Why is she naked?!” Mom turned to him with an unfamiliar demanding tone. “Explain! Now!”

“I don’t…!” Izuku was, completely, lost. “I don’t know…! I think - she was-!?”

Ochako stopped screaming, and said, “We don’t know! She - the frog - it exploded and - it was a frog before-!”

“A frog!?” Mom shouted - his mom never shouted. Izuku felt like reality was fraying at the seams. “What-”

“RIBBIT.”

Everything stopped. Ochako stopped. His mom stopped. Izuku felt like he suddenly lost the ability to breathe, like someone clicked ‘end task’ on his lungs and his panicking head.

The girl’s eyes were very, very big, an expression of pure confusion and shock on her face. “RIBBIT!” She screeched, again.

“R…’ribbit’…?” Mom said, weakly. “What do you mean…?”

“...” The girl stared at Mom with a wild lack of recognition. Not just that she didn’t know who Mom was; she had no idea what she was seeing at all and was completely lost. Izuku was almost as lost, really. “Ribbit…”

Ochako swayed lightly, gripping Izuku’s arm. “S-so - the frog was there before - did she come out of the frog…?!”

Izuku looked at the frog flesh and slime splayed on his bed. “…P…probably…”

His mom’s expression faded from extreme shock and confusion, to general surprise. “Izuku, Ochako, please explain - what is this mess - who is she-”

“I don’t know!” Izuku burst, shaking a little. “I don’t know! It was a frog before and now its a girl and Shouto didn’t tell me and I don’t know-”

“Izuku-”

“Izuku, baby, calm down,” Mom quickly crossed the room to him, softly taking his hands. “It’s okay, I’m sorry I yelled. I’m sorry. Let’s have some tea, and we’ll talk about it, okay?”

“...O…okay.”

 _______________________________________________________________

 Tea with a splash of honey was always good. It warmed him down to his core. The girl seemed to also be enjoying it, if her regular sips were any indicator. Even if she was a bit tentative, slow, testing about it, each time.

His mom sighed heavily. “So, according to your story, she’s…”

Ochako hummed. “Yeah. I don’t believe it either. We should call Shouto.”

“He’d love this,” Izuku mumbled, staring into his tea. “He probably knows what…she is. I certainly don’t.”

“...Well,” Mom glanced at the girl. She had a permanent frown on her face. “We’ll deal with this tomorrow. Today, we’ll…well, It’s already five, isn’t it?”

Izuku dropped his head onto the table. “One hour. Please. I want sleep. I didn’t sleep at all.”

“Ditto,” Ochako also dropped her head, with a heavy thud. “No sleep. At all. I almost was asleep, but then Deku called…”

“Sorry…”

“’S alright….I wouldn’t wanna miss this.” She huffed a laugh. “Somehow, I’m glad I saw it live.”

Mom sighed again, sounding old. “Okay,” She said. “You only have about two hours, though. Remember, you both promised you would ride to school this year.”

Izuku groaned, muffling himself on the wood table. Ochako also whined. The girl watched the both of them curiously.

His mom agreed to watch the girl while they napped; Izuku was so not sleeping in his bed, so he took Mom’s bed instead. Ochako splayed out over one half of the king-sized bed while Izuku took up one third, sharing it because his mom’s bed was wonderful.

It was, without a doubt, the worst nap of his life. Because just as he was getting settled in and kind of almost sleeping, the six o’clock alarm on Mom’s bedside table buzzed loudly. Along with the knee Ochako unconsciously jammed halfway up his ass and her loud drool-snore-choke-drowning, he kind of wanted to die, to get some real sleep. The reason why he stopped sleeping in the same bed as Uraraka Ochako came back to him. Violently, in the form of a foot mysteriously journeying its way up his pants. She was just the weirdest sleeper.

He untangled himself from the covers and Ochako and trudged down the hall. He went to his room, intent on grabbing a shower before school.

He grabbed his clothes from his closet and was on his way to the bathroom before he suddenly recalled what happened last night. Where the fuck was that girl-

He ran around the house, looking for her and Mom - the car was gone from the driveway. His mom had work early in the day, so that was normal, but the girl was still nowhere to be seen. Where was she?!

He texted his mom urgently, and she responded, I left her at home. She should be there with you. Have a good day at school <3

One, was he really going to just leave her at home all day? And two, she was absolutely nowhere to be seen. He checked the kitchen, the living room, all the closets, both bedrooms, and their house was one floor and small as fuck, so there wasn’t many places to hide. She was gone.

And then Ochako screamed. Izuku could probably guess where frog girl was.

He ran to Mom’s room, and there she was, Ochako standing on the bed in a martial arts defensive position with frog girl sitting on the floor, blinking cluelessly, now dressed in spare clothes Ochako left here. But she still had such an alien air around her that it felt like the clothes didn’t quite fit her. She confounded Izuku on every level.

Izuku was cobbling together some way to react to the situation when his phone started ringing. He answered.

“H-hello?!”

“Is the frog okay?”

Shouto. Izuku felt a range of emotions, from relief to joy to murderous intent to numbness. “…It turned into a person, Shouto. A girl. Did you know this would happen!?”

A silence passed.

“Shouto?”

“...S-sorry, I…”

“Shouto, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, I just…” He sniffed faintly. “I wanted to see it.”

“You knew it would happen?!”

“No, but I had a feeling. Part of the witness reports described a frog standing on two legs like a person, and even people with frog-like features, y’know, like a person, but a frog.” Shouto sighed. “So either it was just one creature that could shapeshift to varying levels of frog to humanoid, or it was many creatures that were all varying levels of frog to humanoid. Like kappas or something.” Something tapped rhythmically in the background. “I wished I could’ve seen the shift. Do you still have the shed skin?”

“For what, Shouto,” Izuku was, frankly, pretty fed up. The frog girl was now on top of Ochako and very closely watching her, scanning her features. “What are you going to do with a giant frog flesh bag, Shouto.”

“Research.”

“Shouto.”

“Testing.”

“Shouto! You’re missing the-”

“Fine!” The other boy huffed roughly. “I’m gonna call Mei and cash in a debt to use her research facilities.”

“Shouto, I love you, but you have a C in chemistry. But that’s beside the-”

“She’s going to examine the frog skin, okay?! That’s it! Sorry I don’t have a genetics lab in my fucking basement!”

Izuku tried to be exasperated, but he ended up fighting back a smile. “N-no, Shouto, that’s not - I - whatever Mei has to do with it, it’s a nasty sack of frog skin, Shouto. I was talking more as in, ‘it’s absurd that you would want it, so why’, not ‘you don’t have the means to do anything with it, so why’.”

Shouto went quiet. “…” It was a long, self-depreciating quiet.

“Look,” Izuku said, smile fading, because fuck, Shouto drove him crazy sometimes. “Get your ass over here and help me decide what we’re going to do about her. She can’t stay here while we’re at school all day, can she?”

“I don’t see why not,” Shouto mumbled. “Can’t take her to school. Can’t let her loose.”

“Shouto, you have the skin, basically, so you have a model of what the crypid frog looks like, right? And proof?”

“Yeah. That’s the best part.”

“So do we really need to keep her?” Izuku watched as the girl tried to lick Ochako with a freakishly long tongue. Being a reasonable human being, the brown-haired girl was scrambling away before she made contact. “She’s…well, I mean, endangered species preservation, right? And - I dunno, what’re we gonna keep her for? She looks like a person, kind of…it’d be weird. Morally.”

“...How human does she seem?”

“One hundred percent. She has big eyes, but that can be passed off as a feature, y’know?” Ochako ran to the doorway - the girl opened her mouth wide, tongue flicking out, and it reached all the way across the room, wrapping around Ochako’s waist and pulling her back in. Izuku flinched as his friend shrieked. “…But her tongue is super long and weird, like a frog’s, and she currently has captured Ochako with it.”

“...Well, human meat doesn’t sit well with frogs, so she isn’t going to try to eat her. Unless she’s an adventurous type or something. I mean, she is a monster, so she’s probably full of surprises. Don’t trust her.” Shouto laughed, like this was a joke. Izuku didn’t find it very funny...How did he know that human meat doesn’t sit well with frogs…?

Ochako was released once she was dragged close enough for the girl to grab her. “So we’re just gonna leave her in my house for the day.”

“Yeah.”

“There are hazards everywhere, Shouto.”

“She’ll probably be fine.”

“But what if my Xbox isn’t, Shouto? What if she burns my house down, Shouto? What if she breaks my Xbox Shouto-”

“Forget about your Xbox,” Shouto snapped. Izuku gasped loudly. “It’ll be fine. She won’t mess with anything. I think. And like you said, if she escapes, it isn’t that bad. As long as the skin is still there, she exists. That’s all I need. I have to take a shower before school, I smell like black coffee and steroids. Later.”

And there he went. Almost angrily, Izuku pocketed his phone and said, “H-hey!”

Frog girl looked at Izuku boredly. “Help me,” Ochako begged, held captive by the two arms around her waist. Izuku debated the pros and cons of tearing her away from the literally mutant creature. What was the likelihood of survival?

“We have an hour before we meet up with Shouto,” Izuku stated flatly. “I’m taking a shower first.”

“No!” In a flash, Ochako twisted free of her bindings and was out of the room, and zooming down the hall. “You take all the hot water!”

Izuku sighed. Frog girl, covered in her own hair like she was drowning in it, stared at him with wide green eyes. He averted his gaze, nervously.

“U-uh, hi,” He said. Wow, could he be any more awkward? Well, she wasn’t human, so it wasn’t like she’d pick up on any of human societal nuances-

“Hi.”

She said. She fucking said. She said?! She said. She talked. She said words. She said ‘hi’. Whoawhoawhoa - it had to be simple parroting, it had to be just-

“Where did she go.”

Izuku felt the inexplicable urge to cry. “Wh-wh-wh-wh-wh-”

Frog girl stared at Izuku, eyes peeking between strands of hair with a strange light. “Where is she.”

“I-I-I-I-I-d-d-d-d-on’t-”

She stood up, and walked past him with halting, almost jerking steps. She left the room, and looked one way, then the other. “…”

“O-O-Ochako?!” Izuku felt like curling up in a corner and sobbing wildly. He felt like he just looked into the void and it talked back to him. He felt a number of things, and all of them involved some level of existential terror. “Sh-she’s i-in the sh-shower…D-don’t-”

She was already on her way down the hallway. Izuku didn’t really think upsetting this being of mysterious and potentially reality-breaking power was a good idea. Technically, she was another girl, so it wouldn’t be that weird for her to walk in on Ochako, right? Uh.

Right on cue, Ochako screamed. Izuku groaned. By finding this cursed being, Shouto effectively turned his life upside down. For better or worse was yet to be seen. But from how Ochako was currently fighting frog girl out of her shower, it was probably for worse. Would his life ever go back to normal?

 _______________________________________________________________

 By some miracle, they managed to get on the road on time, meeting up with Shouto on the way. While he and Ochako rode very practical bikes, he rode a skateboard. Why, he refused to really tell. If he wasn’t wearing his school uniform, he’d look like he was in the wrong decade. And somehow the uniform made it look even tackier. But it was alright. It wasn’t like he was bad at it; in fact, he pulled many moves that were reminiscent of a certain famous skateboarder, but he was also from the wrong decade. Somehow, it suited him. He, to a concerning level, didn’t care what other people thought of him, so it was okay. Just weird.

“So,” Shouto said, cruising along with Ochako, keeping up easily despite having much smaller wheels. Also weird. “Show me a pic of her.”

“A what?” Izuku blinked.

“A picture.” Shouto raised an eyebrow. “Don’t tell me you didn’t take a picture.”

“...”

Ochako shrugged, rhythmically tapping her bell. “Didn’t think to.”

The boy huffed. “You guys are the worst,” He said. “How are we supposed to get proof that she shapeshifted if we didn’t get the after picture?”

“Shouto, I’m tired,” Izuku sighed. “I’m sorry. But this is way over my head. I’m not good at…this paranormal cryptid stuff. It’s fun when it’s just creepy stories, but - I dunno, this is too much.” He shuddered. “She talked. Just, started saying words. Like a normal person - super blunt and to the point, but it was like she said it like that on purpose. She knew. Just like that. And she was a frog before-”

“She talked?!” Shouto’s eyes lit up. “What did she say? What did her voice sound like? Ugh, I wish we got it on tape-”

“Shouto!” Izuku snapped. “Pay attention! Forget that stuff - I don’t want any part in it anymore! I’m scared! After school, we’re gonna let her go, and that’s gonna be the end of it! Okay!?” If there’s even a home to return to, Izuku thought bitterly.

Shouto stared at him, blankly. Then he looked away. “…Alright.”

Ochako whistled. “You guys fall out hard,” She said. “I give it…three days before one of you starts apologizing.”

Izuku’s face burned. He was the one apologizing, most of the time. But not this time, He thought resolutely. He wasn’t at fault here. Shouto was going to apologize to him, for dragging him into this mess in the first place.

 _______________________________________________________________

 [10:25 A.M.]

nessie: im dying. im actually dying

shouto: why

nessie: what the fuck is a lamange

nessie: mange is a disease

nessie: in french it means what??? food???? kill me

shouto: it means eat

shouto: pay attention in class and you might get it

nessie: fuck you

nessie: youre the last person i want to hear that from

shouto: ow

nessie: Rip Believe It Or Not

shouto: Ripley’s I Know This Stuff Is Real, But I Can’t Handle It, Dog

nessie: nibyguvtfcu

nessie: so you do get it

shouto: get what

shouto: what

nessie: oh my god

nessie: Oh My God

nessie: you are a national treasure

nessie: you know that

shouto: ??????

shouto: ?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!!what am I missing now

nessie: shut up for a minute teach coming

shouto: well I hope not thats a little inappropriate

---

[10:30 A.M.]

nessie: shouto holy shit what the fuck oh my god what the fuck

nessie: dude

shouto: yeah I sent that without thinking

shouto: and then I couldnt send a correction because

shouto: and yeah

nessie: dude

pppppppppppink: whats happening

pppppppppppink: oh wow what was that shouto hahahahha

shouto: oh my god look it was an accident

tenya: ochako its hardly fair to make fun of him for that

tenya: it was an honest mistake

nessie: tenya coughs, “unfortunately”

shouto: say that shit to my face deku

shouto: whos on the football team huh

nessie: surprised you caught that

nessie: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

shouto: i am going to kill you,

pppppppppppink: hey no death threats on my friendly christian minecraft server

nessie: deadmeme

tenya: yes, death threats are not the way to handle strife between friends

tenya: but neither were those insults, izuku

tenya: you know shouto’s skill does not warrant comments such as those

nessie: hes gonna get a coma i know it

tenya: what does that have to do with anything

nessie: football

nessie: caveman sport

tenya: that is inappropriate

shouto: dudedudedude look man

shouto: im sorry okay

nessie: FOR WHAT SHOUTO

shouto: I DONT KNOW

pppppppppppink: wow that was fast

tenya: please quiet teacher

------

[10:35 A.M.]

shouto: look man I dont know what youre so angry about

nessie: im not angry

pppppppppppink: izuku coughs, “im furious”

nessie: im n o t

tenya: izuku i believe you are, in fact, angry

nessie: im not angry

shouto: youre angry

nessie: SHOUTO WHAT THE FUCK MAN

nessie: EXCUSE ME IF IM A LITTLE SHAKEN UP ABOUT YOU DROPPING A FUCKING FROG DEMON ONTO ME

shouto: i wouldve kept it if i could

shouto: but i forced it onto you without asking

shouto: sorry

nessie: “sorry if i valued a mythical creature above my friends feelings”

shouto: well fuck

shouto: i tried

shouto: yeah fuck you

shouto: i wouldve loved to have it

shouto: you love it when i talk to you about it so what the fuck is the difference

nessie: THEYRE JUST STORIES

nessie: S T O R I E S

nessie: I DONT WANT THEM TO BE REAL

nessie: ITS TOO MUCH

nessie: ITS SCARY

shouto: dude theres always a chance of the stories being real

shouto: you didnt know that

nessie: dontdothat

nessie: i dont want to think of them like that

nessie: no one wants them to be real

shouto: i do

nessie: yeah but ur a weirdo

tenya: foul

pppppppppppink: yeah try again

pppppppppppink: stay within bounds

nessie: are you reffing our fight

tenya: yes

tenya: go on

shouto: dude if you dont want any part of it then ill take her okay

shouto: okay?

nessie: that isnt it

nessie: because ur gonna be all weird about it and be all offended

nessie: bullshit

nessie: were gonna straighten this out here

nessie: rn

tenya: as a distraction in class.

nessie: sure

shouto: im not gonna be offended

pppppppppppink: hahahahhahahhha

shouto: im not

tenya: you will be offended

nessie: you will be offended

nessie: you dont think my fear is valid

shouto: being scared of it and pushing it away isnt going to make it disappear

shouto: theres a monster under your bed whether you want it to be there or not

nessie: oh my FUCKING GOD SHOUTO

nessie: THIS IS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT

nessie: YOU DONT LISTEN TO ME

shouto: i am

shouto: im doing nothing but listening to you

shouto: im getting on aizawas nerves

tenya: he means respect

tenya: you arent respecting him

tenya: as evidenced by you “twisting the knife”, for lack of a better term

tenya: you understand that stories of paranormal activities entertain him?

shouto: yes

tenya: the rift seems to lay in the fact that although he enjoys them as stories, he does not wish them to be real, intimate experiences

tenya: this is where you two seem to split

tenya: because you strive to live the stories

pppppppppppink: *is eating popcorn* marriage counseling :D

shouto: i mean who wouldnt

nessie: I DONT I DONT I DONT I DONT I DONT

nessie: NONONONONONONONO

nessie: UCK AMN DO YOU THIINK I WANNA FUCKING

nessie: THAT IS

nessie: NOOONONONONOONONO

shouto: shit man calm down

shouto: so it scares you

nessie: fuck yess??? you get it????finally????

shouto: why

[nessie has left the group chat.]

pppppppppppink: dude you messed up

shouto: .

tenya: i advise understanding

tenya: not everyone feels the same way you do

shouto: well duh

shouto: but it isnt scary

shouto: .

pppppppppppink: are you hearing yourself? finally?

pppppppppppink: not to be mean, ur just

pppppppppppink: really dense :D

tenya: to him, it is scary.

tenya: and thats just how he works

tenya: youll have to respect that

shouto: but its not scary

tenya: that is an opinion, shouto

tenya: not fact. it varies from person to person

tenya: you have to respect his opinion, shouto

shouto: .

shouto: god

shouto: fine

tenya: now what’s this about a “frog demon”?

pppppppppppink: ohohoohooho

shouto: first of all, it isnt a demon

pppppppppppink: do i have a story for you!

 _______________________________________________________________

 Izuku settled on giving Shouto the cold shoulder. It lasted out of school and on the way home, even as they pulled up to his house. Even as he kept pestering him with his constant, creepy, begging stare. Fuck him. Because if he talked first, he’d end up apologizing. And he couldn’t do that. He wasn’t the one at fault.

The frog girl was gone. They searched high and low, all over his house, but she was nowhere to be seen. Izuku found the frog skin wrapped up in the dumpster outside, and threw it at Shouto without a word. Shouto didn’t say anything, either.

“Hm,” Ochako popped a sucker into her mouth. “I changed my mind. Two days.”

Izuku grumbled, flushing bright red.

“I find this whole story a little hard to believe,” Tenya said, and Izuku felt a wild urge to punch him. “You mean to tell me that this so-called giant frog split open and turned out to be a young girl? Who is now missing?”

“Tenya, I wish it didn’t happen,” Izuku crossed the driveway, grabbing the taller boy by his quarterback shoulders. “I wish desperately that it didn’t happen. But it did.”

“Oh yeah,” Ochako said, nodding. “It was crazy. I wouldn’t believe it if I hadn’t been there.” With a shrug, she added, “Still kinda in doubt. It was super late.”

“Maybe it was a dream?”

“No,” Shouto said, coming up to show Tenya something on his phone. “Pictures. Video. It’s real. The frog, at least. I also have samples at home. I did some research - actually, there are some frogs that can grow up to about the size of our frog, but they can only live in equatorial Guinea. Without the girl, the skin only proves that a new species of giant frog lives in the area unless they map its genome or something.” He shrugged. “Not the story I was looking for, but cool nonetheless.”

“’Story’?” Izuku bristled. “What are you even looking for, Shouto? Why are you doing this at all?” Whoops. But he couldn’t help it. He’d been wondering it for a while, but this was the breaking point. Would he just hand the girl over to scientists for testing if he did have her? Would they take advantage of the fact that she isn’t human to do whatever they wanted? What was Shouto getting from this? Money? Fame? He wasn’t the type who would search out stuff like that, so what-?!

“Huh?” Shouto tilted his head. “...Why not? It’s fun.”

He could scream. Angrily, he stomped back to the porch, yanking open his door and ready to lock it behind him-

-and the kitchen was a mess, like a tornado whizzed around in the few moments they went outside. The dining table was on its side, chairs thrown around, cabinets raided and foodstuffs everywhere. The fridge was open, and judging from the aggressive clinking going on, someone was there. Izuku could probably guess who it was. But why now? She barely touched anything, earlier.

And then she peeked above the fridge door. Izuku screamed.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

if anyone knows how to color text please tell me because i spent a lot of time coloring the chat messages in the original doc and im sad it didnt carry so please and thank you tell me,

[strayneoculturekids]

High school AU Lee Mark x Reader

A/N: The idea for this fic isn’t completely mine, I got it after seeing a post and I’ve wanted to do it for a while so credit to whoever that person was ALSO I go to a school that has free seating so I have no idea how the teacher’s assign desks so forgive me for any mistakes

Highschool AU

Summary: The person who sits at your desk the period before you in class always left you cute little notes. At first, you think they’re just being sweet, but as the notes start to get a little more specific, you realize you might have a secret admirer.

Genre: Fluff

It was only the last period of your first day back at school, and you were already fed up. Due to the sleep schedule that you completely ruined over the holidays, you didn’t get to bed until around 3am last night. The bags under your eyes were very evident, but no one questioned it, because everyone else had them too.

Except for one person. Actually, he did have them, but did that stop him from being the most loveable person ever? No.

Mark Lee. The boy who always seemed to be so shining and bright, no matter the situation. You had never once seen him in a bad mood, not even today, on the first day of school. This was one of the many, many reasons you had a tiny little crush on him.

Despite Mark’s charming personality and outstanding looks, not a lot of girls were going for him. It was high school. A lot of girls wanted a bad boy and a relationship with no meaning, just for the thrill of it. You found this completely fine, you understood that they just wanted a little bit of relationship experience and to know what it felt like to have a boyfriend like that. 

But some unknowable force just dragged you towards Mark.

You walked into your classroom, being met with the teacher and a few other students.

Ugh, why is the teacher here so early You thought dreadfully

She instructed you to your seat while you put on a fake smile and nodded, walking towards your assigned desk.

You plopped yourself down on the seat before looking down at your desk, not very surprised to see that it had already been graffitied on, it still looked fresh so you assumed that the person who sat at this desk the period before wrote it. just a short sentence.

I know it’s the start of the school year, but keep your chin up! It read

For some absurd reason, the cringey little message left on your desk by the mysterious person put a smile on your face and left your hear a little warm. You were aware that you probably looked like an idiot just staring at your desk and smiling, so after a few seconds, you instantly went back to your resting face.

During the whole class, you kept looking down towards that little note, and it actually helped you study a bit harder. You didn’t know why, but you really enjoyed it.

The next day, the same thing happened, where you saw a new little encouraging message. This went on for a few weeks before you got a message that particularly got your heart racing.

I saw you walking in the halls today, you looked pretty tired. Maybe you should try getting a bit more rest, but I like your new hairstyle!

You tried to think of any possible way as to how this message might not be for you, but alas, when you wiped your fingers across it, it left some ink on you, indicating that it had just been written.

And coincidentally, you had just started styling your hair differently today. You frantically looked around despite knowing that the person who wrote the note would be long gone by now.

A million thoughts were racing through your mind and the period felt like it passed in 5 minutes, but you didn’t retain a single piece of information.

By the time you left school, you were still in a daze but tried not to let it show when you arrived home. You decided that you would sleep on it, and crashed on your bed, falling asleep straight away despite having unfinished homework.

The morning came around far too soon and you got up and dressed slowly, a little bit less sleep deprived due to your extremely early night last night.

You went downstairs, finally noticing the time. It was 15 minutes until school started.

“FUCK” You shouted out loud

“Language” Your dad shouted back

You threw a quick sorry at him, almost deciding to skip breakfast, but weirdly remembering the little note you had gotten a few days previously.

Make sure to eat well!

You cursed yourself for remembering that a time like this and quickly went back to grab an apple from the fridge, racing out the door as quickly as possible, running as fast as your legs could possibly carry you.

You arrive at school in a huffing mess, but you arrived before the bell and that’s all that matters. You quickly went to your locker, instantly noticing the bright pink sticky note that was stuck to it.

You stared at it for a while before finally noticing the small crowd around you, whispering and pointing towards you and the note. After a short episode of dread and embarrassment, you took the note off your locker and read it.

Did you enjoy my notes? I hope so! You’ve been looking a lot healthier lately, I’m glad. Could you stay back after your class this afternoon? I wanna talk.

Your heart was racing at top speed and you felt a blush rise to your face. You gulped but before you had enough time to switch into full panic mode, the bell for the first period rung. You quickly stuffed your things in your locker and got out your books for your first class.

The day felt like it went on forever, you just wanted it to be over! The anticipation of meeting the mysterious stranger leaving you notes was killing you, you couldn’t focus on anything but the sticky note that had been left on your locker.

When the last period came around, you looked down at the desk, noticing that there was no new note. Of course, it was no surprise, however, you were still a bit disappointed.

The period itself felt like it dragged on for days, you kept looking to the clock every five minutes only to discover the time actually hadn’t changed.

Finally, the end of school came around and while everyone else was leaving the room, you were sitting not-so-patiently at your desk, tapping your foot, waiting to see who would come into the room next.

You heard footsteps coming towards the room and your heart was suddenly throbbing in your chest. You started to squirm in your seat until you saw someone walk through the door, that someone making you freeze.

Mark Lee.

His bright, signature smile was lacking for a few seconds, but when he saw you, it returned immediately and you could see his face becoming slightly red.

“M-Mark?!” You almost screamed, standing up from your chair

“S-surprise?” he said, timidly rubbing the back of his neck

Before you could even process the fact that Mark was the one leaving you all those notes, you ran up to him and wrapped him in a bear hug. Which he reciprocated after a few seconds of surprise.

“I can’t believe it was you” You said in a hushed voice

His beautiful smile echoed in the room and you stopped hugging him to look him in the eyes. Both of your faces were almost bright red.

“So...does that mean you do wanna go on a date with me?” he asked, a nervous smile spreading on his perfect face